Posted in: Games, Satire, Video Games | Tagged: Ace Watkins, presidential, twitter, video games

In Conversation With Ace Watkins, The Gamer Presidential Candidate

America's next commander-in-chief could come from any background, presidential candidate Ace Watkins thinks that background should be a gamer and the people seem to agree. Though he has yet to attend the democratic debates, Candidate Watkins has developed a Twitter following of nearly 200,000 people, a greater number than some of those who were invited to the democratic debates. He's even found support in gaming established companies like Corsair, and yet the establishment blocks his publicity, presumably due to his gamer heritage. To finally provide him his time in the spotlight, Bleeding Cool interviewed Candidate Watkins.

BC: With all this hubbub about trade and tariffs, what do you think America should be trading?

Watkins: We must improve our foreign policy, especially when it comes to trade. Trade is so important when you're dealing with Graveler, Kadabra, or any other Pokémon who evolves when traded. But we also need to be making fair trades. If Germany trades us a Growlithe, we need to trade them a Sandshrew so we can both complete our Pokedexes. Those two Pokemon are, after all, exclusive to our regions. Now, I don't necessarily agree with all trade agreements — for many years, the American worker was giving away legendaries for non-exclusives like Ninetales. But that doesn't mean we should completely give up access to Machamp.    

How do you plan to involve game developers in your presidency?

I think game developers need to unionize. The ridiculous crunch periods, the massive layoffs after games come out, the poor working conditions… we need to work together to make sure that game developers are treated fairly. At the same time, however, video game players themselves need to unionize. Many gamers work long into the night, developing erratic sleep patterns which can lead to long-term health issues. In return, instead of a salary, health insurance, and other benefits, developers try to placate gamers with worthless "XP" and loot box credits instead of fair, equitable compensation for our time. With an official gamer union, or "guild," we could begin bargaining for these rights which we desperately need. 

What will your first patch for America include?

A lot of candidates make promises that they insist they will implement during the third year, fourth year, or even the second term of their presidency. In the gaming community, we call this "DLC" and we absolutely hate it. That's why my first patch for America will be a Day One patch and it will include every single one of my campaign promises. With Ace, you get the whole Gamer President that you voted for, right out of the box.

With American laws and ideals gradually shifting every day, what do you believe to be America's canon?

I think America is one giant England fan fiction and, as a result, the canon belongs to the people. It's our job to elect politicians who represent our beliefs and ideas so that we can construct a canon that works for all of us.

You weren't present at the recent Democratic debate, did you tune in? Any thoughts about the night?

I have vowed to not participate in any debates until they change the settings from time to stock and turn off items. I am willing to use Final Smash meter if I absolutely have to, but they weren't balanced for competitive play and they make certain characters too powerful (ie: Cory Booker's where he gets an assist from his girlfriend Rosario Dawson).

What does being a "gamer" president mean to you?

Donald Trump ran in 2016 on the idea that we should run America like a business. This was a colossal failure. We need someone who is willing to run America like a video game. That's what being a Gamer President is all about. Also, we need someone to get us Skate 4 and no one else running even knows what that means.

Many are enraged by the spinning rainbow pinwheel featured on Mac computers, do you believe the symbol should be replaced?

As our first Gamer President, I will be sure to listen to the lower-class citizens that are gaming on Macs and find out what it is that they want to be spinning at odd intervals every time you try to do something. If it ain't THAT broken, maybe we don't need to fix it. 

Will you be doing anything about the notorious hacker, "4Chan?"

This is a common misconception that we need to fix if we are going to move forward in this country. 4Chan is not a hacker. He is a terrorist.

BC: You've announced your plans to take our country in the "gamer direction," but what precisely does that mean to you?

I think being a Gamer means being the best of us. It means being someone who has spent hundreds of hours in Farm Simulator in order to understand our nation's economy. It means installing cooling fans in all of his computers to learn how we can cool our changing climate. It means being someone who has practiced for decades diffusing arguments in the voice chat in order to learn to diplomacy. 

There have been many requests for you to make your Steam library public. Can we have a hint as to what it includes?

Too much attention has been paid to this. After my second term, when it is time to start erecting my Presidential library, at that point I will not only release my Presidential Steam library, but I will also release a YouTube video of the sick ass retro gaming room I converted the oval office into. 

Gun control is a major issue in America. What do you believe should be done about the use of firearms?

We might be a long way off from getting guns off the streets, but we can at least start stressing safer practices. When people are shooting offscreen to reload, those stray bullets are often shattering communities. We need our good guys with guns to be a bit more careful, frankly. I also think we should incorporate common-sense gun control and compromise more with those on the right. If we are going to remove all of the OP guns available to Americans, we can make it so that when you're holding a knife, you run faster.

In addition to gamers, you've garnered support amongst the anime community. Do you watch anime, Candidate Watkins? Do you have a favorite?

This is a great question. Although I do watch and enjoy anime, it is a rather large blind spot for me as a presidential candidate. That's OK  because every candidate has them. What every candidate does not have, however, is self-awareness about their blind spots. When I become president, I vow to create a Secretary of Anime — someone I really trust — in order to make sure I am as up-to-date as possible on all anime news and concerns. What is a president if not the people who make up their party? 

What game do you believe best embodies America?

A copy of Civilization that's running OKAY but should really be restarted and managed a little better. 

Do you have any final words for America, Candidate Watkins?

Legalize video games. Expunge the records of gamers.

That was candidate Ace Watkins. If you want to support his run for president, follow him on Twitter. You may also purchase Ace Watkins apparel from his store.

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