X-ual Healing – The Weekly X-Men Recap Column

Sworn to sell comics for Marvel executives who feared and hated the fact that Fox owned their movie rights, The Uncanny X-Men suffered great indignities, but with a corporate merger on the way, the X-Men can finally get back to doing what they do best: being objectively the best franchise in comics.

Each week, armed with the joy, heartbreak, and frustration of 30+ years of reading X-Men comics, we read every new X-book that comes out, recap the events, provide some back-links to Marvel Unlimited, and wonder when Marvel will let Chris Claremont write something again. Seriously, how do you have the greatest writer in the history of comics on the payroll and just not use him for anything?

It's the way X-Men comics were meant to be read! It's the column that can only be known as…


X-Men #10 Delivers on a Longtime Promise [XH]

X-Men #10 Delivers on a Longtime Promise [XH]

Howdy folks welcome to X-ual Healing, the number one weekly X-Men recap column with a sex-based pun for a name. There are three X-Books to recap this week — X-Men #10, Cable #2, and X-Factor #1 — and I gotta hurry up and get back to the blissful world of pro wrestling reporting so let's […]

Cable Gets Freaky With Quintuplets in Cable #2 [XH]

Cable Gets Freaky With Quintuplets in Cable #2 [XH]

Howdy folks welcome to X-ual Healing, the number one weekly X-Men recap column with a sex-based pun for a name. There are three X-Books to recap this week — X-Men #10, Cable #2, and X-Factor #1 — and I gotta hurry up and get back to the blissful world of pro wrestling reporting so let's […]

X-ploring the Mutant Resurrection Protocols in X-Factor #1 [XH]

X-ploring the Mutant Resurrection Protocols in X-Factor #1 [XH]

Howdy folks welcome to X-ual Healing, the number one weekly X-Men recap column with a sex-based pun for a name. There are three X-Books to recap this week — X-Men #10, Cable #2, and X-Factor #1 — and I gotta hurry up and get back to the blissful world of pro wrestling reporting so let's […]

Hellions #2: Are These Marauders Still Under Warranty [XH]

Hellions #2: Are These Marauders Still Under Warranty? [XH]

Hi, and welcome to X-ual Healing, the number one sex-themed weekly X-Men recap column on the web. Five X-books came out last week, so let's get right down to business with Hellions #2. Oh, and by the way, in a new feature, down at the bottom of this week's articles, you'll find a table of […]

Empyre: X-Men #1 &#8211 Plants vs. Zombies vs. Soulless Event Tie-Ins [XH]

Empyre: X-Men #1 – Plants vs. Zombies vs. Soulless Event Tie-Ins [XH]

Well, that was a fun San Diego Comic-Con. And by fun, I mean boring and a complete waste of time. Was anything worthwhile even announced at the show? How many people sat through those Zoom videos? Hopefully, this pandemic gets taken care of by next year because I think I'd rather get the coronavirus than […]

Wolverine #3 &#8211 Yes Its True. This Man Has Two D**ks [XH]

Wolverine #3 – Yes, It's True. This Man Has Two D**ks [XH]

We interrupt your regularly scheduled X-ual Healing programming with the following important message: Wolverine Two-Dick Trutherism has finally gone mainstream! Just check out this tweet from superstar comic book artist Rob Liefeld: Someone in the comic store said Wolverine has 2 penises now?? Is that true? When was that revealed? — robliefeld (@robertliefeld) July 22, […]

New Mutants #11 &#8211 Is This Storyline Finally Over Now [XH]

New Mutants #11 – Is This Storyline Finally Over Now? [XH]

Hi, and welcome to X-ual Healing, the number one sex-themed weekly X-Men recap column on the web. Marvel somehow found the time to squeeze out five X-books last week, so let's get right down to business and recap New Mutants #11. Oh, and by the way, in a new feature, down at the bottom of […]

X-Men/Fantastic Four #4 &#8211 Yes This Book Still Exists [XH]

X-Men/Fantastic Four #4 – Yes, This Book Still Exists [XH]

Hi, and welcome to X-ual Healing, the number one sex-themed weekly X-Men recap column on the web. Marvel somehow found the time to squeeze out five X-books last week, and we're now down to the final book we have to recap: X-Men/Fantastic Four #4! Oh, and by the way, in a new feature, down at […]

iWolverine 2020 #1 Has Little to Do With a Dumb Iron Man Event [XH]

iWolverine 2020 #1 Has Little to Do With a Dumb Iron Man Event [XH]

Well, it's almost a new week of comics, so I'd better hurry up and get the last X-Men book from last week's haul recapped. iWolverine 2020 #1 is ostensibly a part of the Iron Man 2020 event, which sucks because Iron Man is stupid and events are stupid. However, it is written by the legendary […]

Giant-Size X-Men: Magneto #1 is 50 Cents of Comic in a $5 Bag [XH]

Giant-Size X-Men: Magneto #1 is 50 Cents of Comic in a $5 Bag [XH]

It's time for more X-ual Healing, the weekly X-Men (and now more than X-Men) recap column where I tell you what happened in some comics (such as Giant-Size X-Men: Magneto) and also talk about the comics news because I'm too busy writing about wrestling news to write about comics news any more. The big story […]

GI Joe Goes Full Liefeld in Snake Eyes: Deadgame #1 [XH]

GI Joe Goes Full Liefeld in Snake Eyes: Deadgame #1 [XH]

As Bleeding Cool readers have likely noticed (and given thanks for), your old pal Jude Terror has been spending a lot of time making fun of the latest wrestling news over in our wrestling section. That's left me with less time to make fun of the latest comics news, so I thought perhaps I ought […]

X-Force #10: Wolverine Operating at 50% Capacity [XH]

X-Force #10: Wolverine Operating at 50% Capacity [XH]

The pandemic continues to rage, and the future of the comic book industry remains uncertain, but Marvel is still cranking out X-Books as X-Force #10 hit stores last Wednesday. And so, your favorite weekly X-Men recap column continues for another week as we tell you all about what happened. The big news in comics this […]

In This Issue a Betsy Braddock WILL DIE &#8211 Excalibur #10 [XH]

In This Issue, a Betsy Braddock WILL DIE! – Excalibur #10 [XH]

Things are kinda sorta ramping up in the comic book industry, and there were three X-books in stores last week. Of course, while things are kinda sorta ramping up, they're also kinda sorta completely imploding, as DC has split with Diamond and retailers are saying the sky is falling. Of course, I've been warning about […]

Budding Romance and Senseless Monster Killing in Deadpool #5 [XH]

Budding Romance and Senseless Monster Killing in Deadpool #5 [XH]

Things are kinda sorta ramping up in the comic book industry, and there were three X-books in stores last week. Of course, while things are kinda sorta ramping up, they're also kinda sorta completely imploding, as DC has split with Diamond and retailers are saying the sky is falling. Of course, I've been warning about […]

Cooking with Glob Herman in New Mutants #10 [XH]

Cooking with Glob Herman in New Mutants #10 [XH]

Things are kinda sorta ramping up in the comic book industry, and there were three X-books in stores last week. Of course, while things are kinda sorta ramping up, they're also kinda sorta completely imploding, as DC has split with Diamond and retailers are saying the sky is falling. Of course, I've been warning about […]

The Secret to Emma Frosts Success in Marauders #10 [XH]

The Secret to Emma Frost's Success in Marauders #10 [XH]

With Marauders #10, the first X-Men comic in stores since the pandemic started in America, it looks like the comics industry is finally "back." They've got t-shirts and everything, even if Steve Geppi totally ripped off the slogan from The Situation of Jersey Shore fame. For me, and for many people I think, the industry […]

Giant-Size X-Men: Nightcrawler #1 Recap: An In-Sidri-Ous Surprise

Giant-Size X-Men: Nightcrawler #1 Recap: An In-Sidri-Ous Surprise

Giant-Size X-Men: Nightcrawler #1 was written by Jonathan Hickman with art by Alan Davis. Carlos Lopez did color art and Clayton Cowles lettered. It's the second in a series of five Giant-Size X-Men one-shots focusing on specific X-Men. When the next one will hit stores remains up-in-the-air during the industry shutdown. Thankfully, the one-and-done nature […]

X-Men/Fantastic Four #3 Recap: The Failure of Krakoan Diplomacy

X-Men/Fantastic Four #3 Recap: The Failure of Krakoan Diplomacy

X-Men/Fantastic Four #3 was written by Chip Zdarsky with art by Terry Dodson, Rachel Dodson, and Ransom Getty. Laura Martin, Andrew Crossley, and Peter Pantazis handled colors. Joe Caramagna lettered. The issue is the third of a four-issue series, but the fourth issue is delayed while the industry is shut down. Setting aside, for now, […]

Hellions #2 Recap: If At First You Dont Succeed Try Try Again

Hellions #2 Recap: If At First You Don't Succeed, Try, Try Again

Hellions #1 is written by Zeb Wells with art by Stephen Segovia. David Curiel handled colors, with Cory Petit on lettering. The series is Marvel's second take on Fallen Angels, which petered out after one storyline. It's unfortunate timing to launch a new series, now that the industry is shut down and we don't know […]

Wolverine #2 Recap: Wolverine Does What He Does Best Again and Again

Wolverine #2 Recap: Wolverine Does What He Does Best Again and Again

Wolverine #2 was written by Benjamin Percy with art by Adam Kubert, colors by Frank Martin, and letters by Cory Petit. It's only the second issue of the series, but like all of Marvel's comics, its on a hiatus after this issue. But Wolverine still must figure out who's been making street drugs out of […]