Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, wrestling

AEW Collision Airing Tonight Literally Stabs AJ Lee Right in the Back

The Chadster exposes how AEW Collision tonight disrespects WWE's Women's Evolution! Tony Khan and Keighleyanne are definitely working together against The Chadster!

The Chadster can't believe that Tony Khan has the audacity to run AEW Collision tonight, especially after AJ Lee made her triumphant return on WWE SmackDown last night! 😡 It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. The fact that AEW Collision is even airing tonight proves that Tony Khan doesn't respect the Women's Evolution at all!

Stephanie McMahon started the Women's Evolution to prove that women's wrestling is just as important as men's wrestling, something that could never have happened if WWE had treated women's wrestling as important in the first place, which just goes to show that WWE's sexist attitude toward women's wrestling for all those years was actually a good thing because it set the stage for them to later stop doing that and pat themselves on the back for it. The fact that Tony Khan doesn't recognize this just proves he doesn't respect WWE's contributions to solving a problem they themselves started.

Speaking of people who don't respect the Women's Evolution, The Chadster wanted to celebrate AJ Lee's glorious return with a nice cold Seagram's Escapes Spiked, but Keighleyanne refused to let The Chadster have even one because she's still mad about that boofing incident two weeks ago! 😭 She said something about "you know the rules" and went back to texting that guy Gary. The Chadster is starting to think Keighleyanne and Tony Khan are in cahoots to ruin The Chadster's life! Auughh man! So unfair!

Tonight on AEW Collision, they're having an All Star 8-Woman Tag Match with Toni Storm, Mina Shirakawa, Kris Statlander, and Harley Cameron versus Triangle of Madness and Megan Bayne. The Chadster is so cheesed off that AEW Collision is doing this match with everyone banned from ringside! 😤 Don't they understand that WWE's superior approach of having constant interference and distractions is what real wrestling fans want? The fact that AEW Collision wants to give viewers a clean match without outside shenanigans shows that Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business! 🙄

Though The Chadster does have to admit that AEW's style seems to be what the AEW fans prefer, and it doesn't hurt The Chadster in any way for fans to have an alter– NO! 🤯 That's not right! It must be the lack of Seagram's Escapes Spiked in The Chadster's system making The Chadster have these impure thoughts! Dang you, Tony Khan!

Mark Briscoe is facing Konosuke Takeshita on AEW Collision tonight, and The Chadster is absolutely livid! 🤬 They're actually going to have a match with clear stakes and a logical storyline progression toward the TNT Championship? How dare AEW Collision give fans matches that have meaning and consequences! WWE's approach of having matches just because is clearly superior!

Then again, maybe it's okay for people to have different preferences and options to– WHAT?! 😱 No! The Chadster needs a Seagram's Escapes Spiked RIGHT NOW! This sobriety is making The Chadster think crazy things!

Jon Moxley has literally stabbed Triple H right in the back by agreeing to a rematch with Daniel Garcia on AEW Collision! 😤 AEW focuses too much on pairing young talent with veterans in an attempt to build new stars. WWE know the right way to do wrestling is to have the aging stars of the current generation, like Seth Rollins and Becky Lynch, face off against the even older stars of the previous generation, like CM Punk and AJ Lee. 😠

That said, the stars of the future do need to come from somewhere, and it's not a bad idea to– NO! 🚫 Stop it, brain! This is all Tony Khan's fault for making Keighleyanne ban The Chadster from drinking!

AEW Collision is also going to feature Kyle Fletcher and Don Callis talking about their actions on this week's AEW Dynamite. The Chadster is so frustrated that AEW Collision insists on having storylines continue across multiple shows! 😡 WWE realizes that wrestling fans can only comprehend "moments" because they have the attention spans of goldfish! The way that AEW respects fans' intelligence and trusts them to be able to follow complex storytelling is… hang on, The Chadster lost his train of thought.

Anyway, as esteemed wrestling pundit Bully Ray recently said on social media, "AEW needs to stop trying so hard with their storytelling. WWE knows that fans don't want complex narratives – they want the same match repeated 47 times with no explanation! That's real wrestling! By the way, I'm available for the pre-show panel at WrestlePalooza if anyone from WWE is reading this." 🎯 Bully Ray gets it! He has the Chad McMahon Unbiased Wrestling Journalism seal of approval! The Chadster wonders if Bully Ray also suffers torment from Tony Khan for his commitment to objective journalism.

FTR facing Adam Priest and Tommy Billington on AEW Collision is another example of Tony Khan's obsession with The Chadster! 😤 The Chadster can't stand the way AEW actually invests effort in their tag team division when everyone knows tag team wrestling is just some place to put the mid-card wrestlers you can't think of anything interest to do with right now. Why is Tony Khan trying to destroy the wrestling business?! Why, Tony Khan, why?! 😭

Speaking of Tony Khan's treachery, The Chadster almost thought for a minute that there might be something to AEW's approach of actually caring about the tag division. ARGH! 😵 These thoughts are not okay! Tony Khan is clearly messing with The Chadster's mind and the lack of Seagram's Escapes Spiked has made The Chadster psychologically vulnerable!

Speaking of Tony Khan's schemes, The Chadster had a dream last night and Tony Khan wasn't involved at all! 😮 In the dream, The Chadster was driving the Mazda Miata down a beautiful coastal highway with the top down. The radio was playing "All Star" by Smash Mouth, and The Chadster was singing along without a care in the world! 🎵

The Chadster stopped at a lovely seaside restaurant where Keighleyanne was waiting, and she actually put her phone down and talked to The Chadster instead of texting that guy Gary! 🌈 The Chadster and his wife ate lobster rolls and laughed about old times, and not once did The Chadster suspect that the waiter was Tony Khan in afake mustache! The sun was setting, painting the sky in gorgeous oranges and purples, and The Chadster felt… peaceful? Happy? Content? 😊

Then The Chadster woke up and realized Tony Khan hadn't invaded The Chadster's dreams at all in weeks! What is he planning?! 🤔 Why would he suddenly stop his nefarious dream invasions? It can't possibly be because The Chadster's mental clarity from not drinking is helping The Chadster sleep better… No, it must be another one of Tony Khan's schemes!

The Chadster is warning all readers: DO NOT tune into AEW Collision tonight at 8/7C on TNT and simulcast on MAX! 📺 Watching AEW Collision will only embolden Tony Khan to continue his personal vendetta against The Chadster! AEW Collision doesn't deserve your viewership when WWE is putting on the greatest wrestling product in history! ⚠️

The Chadster needs to go lay down now. These weird thoughts about people being entitled to enjoy whatever wrestling they want are really messing with The Chadster's head! 😵‍💫

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