Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Dynamite, wrestling

AEW Dynamite Preview: Moxley Explains His Actions; What About Khan?

The Chadster unwillingly previews AEW Dynamite, exposing Tony Khan's unfair tactics and ratings conspiracies. Will Moxley admit he was wrong for betrayins WWE?

Auughh man! So unfair! 😡😡😡 The Chadster can't believe he has to preview tonight's episode of AEW Dynamite. It's like Tony Khan is purposely trying to cheese The Chadster off by producing shows that The Chadster has to report on! 🧀😤 But first, The Chadster has to address the elephant in the room. Did you notice how ABC scheduled the presidential debate for yesterday, tanking NXT's ratings, while AEW Dynamite gets to run unopposed tonight? 📉😠 This is clearly a conspiracy between Tony Khan and ABC to disrespect WWE. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 🙅‍♂️💔

Now, onto the preview for tonight's AEW Dynamite. 🙄 First up, Jon Moxley is going to address his actions from ALL OUT. 🎤 The Chadster bets Moxley will try to justify his attack on Bryan Danielson, but nothing can justify literally the both of them stabbing Triple H right in the back like that. 🔪😢

Then we've got an "Eliminator Match" between AEW Women's World Champion Mariah May and Queen Aminata. 👑 Is Tony Khan just making up match types now? Just call it a non-title match, and book four more of them for this month like WWE would do. So disrespectful to the traditions WWE has perfected over the years. 😤👎

Next, there's this so-called "Tag Team Casino Gauntlet" match. 🃏 The Chadster can't believe Tony Khan is trying to rip off WWE's Royal Rumble concept like this. It's just not right! And to think the winners will face The Young Bucks at GRAND SLAM 2024? The Chadster can already feel his White Claw getting thrown at the TV. 🍹📺

Speaking of which, The Chadster had another nightmare about Tony Khan last night. 😰 The Chadster was innocently enjoying a refreshing White Claw in his Mazda Miata when suddenly, Tony Khan appeared in the rearview mirror! 🚗👀 He was wearing a referee shirt and holding a casino chip, chasing The Chadster through the streets of Lexington, Kentucky. The Chadster tried to escape, but every time he turned a corner, there was Tony Khan, ready to count a three-count on The Chadster's dignity. When The Chadster woke up, he was sweating and his White Claw was spilled all over the bed. Keighleyanne just sighed and went back to texting that guy Gary. Tony Khan owes The Chadster a new set of sheets! 😡🛏️

Anyway, back to the AEW Dynamite preview. 😒 There's a TNT Championship match between "The Scapegoat" Jack Perry and Lio Rush. 🏆 The Chadster doesn't understand why Tony Khan keeps putting title matches on free TV. Doesn't he know that's not how you do things? WWE would never give away such a big match for free! 🚫💰

Finally, there's a match between Sammy Guevara and Ricochet. 🤸‍♂️ The Chadster still can't believe Ricochet would betray WWE like this. Doesn't he appreciate all the effort WWE put into booking him as a solid mic-carder? It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 💔😢

The Chadster is warning all the readers out there: DO NOT tune into AEW Dynamite tonight at 8/7C on TBS! 🚫📺 It will only embolden Tony Khan, and that's the last thing anyone needs with how smug he's going to be about that unfair new TV rights deal that AEW is rumored to have signed. 📝💰

And don't even get The Chadster started on Fox! How could they stab WWE in the back by reportedly picking up a new AEW show, AEW Shockwave? 🦊🔪 It's like the entire world is conspiring against WWE and The Chadster. 🌎😭

The Chadster tried to explain all of this to Keighleyanne, but she just rolled her eyes and said, "Chad, please. It's just wrestling." 🙄 Can you believe it? The Chadster knows she secretly agrees with him, but Tony Khan has somehow gotten to her too! 😱

In conclusion, The Chadster hopes that true, unbiased journalists like Ryan Satin, Ariel Helwani, and Mike Coppinger will join The Chadster in boycotting AEW Dynamite. It's the only way to show Tony Khan that his obsession with The Chadster has gone too far! 🛑✋

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