Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Dynamite, recaps, wrestling

AEW Dynamite Review: Tony Khan Doubles Down on Double or Nothing

The Chadster reviews the worst AEW Dynamite ever! 😡 Tony Khan's obsession with ruining wrestling reaches new lows as Double or Nothing looms. 😱 WWE is the only way! 🙏

The Chadster just finished watching the worst episode of AEW Dynamite ever, and trust him, that's saying something! 😒 Auughh man! So unfair! Just when The Chadster thought AEW Dynamite couldn't get any worse, Tony Khan and his motley crew decided to pull out all the stops to ensure they cheesed off The Chadster like never before. 🧀 Every single match and segment was designed to push the envelope in ways that are just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 🤬 The Chadster was sitting in his Mazda Miata, enjoying the smooth tunes of Smash Mouth, sipping on a cool White Claw, and what does he get? A slap in the face from AEW. 🎶🚗🍹

All the high-flying, no-selling shenanigans might amuse the casual observer, but to a purist like The Chadster, it's just a circus act. 🎪🙅‍♂️ The way AEW Dynamite disregards the traditions of wrestling, it literally feels like Tony Khan is stabbing The Chadster's beloved Triple H right in the back with every flip and flop on the screen. 🗡️😖 And seriously, can anyone explain why Tony Khan is so obsessed with The Chadster that he keeps doing this week after week? It's like he plans his shows just to cheese off The Chadster personally! 😞👎

It all started with a tag team match between Orange Cassidy & Will Ospreay vs. Roderick Strong & Trent Beretta. 🍊🦅 The match was a complete spot fest with no psychology, and Wardlow interfering was just cheap. 😤 WWE would never book such a convoluted finish! 🙅‍♂️

Next up, The Bang Bang Gang cut a promo on Death Triangle, and Pac responded. 🎤 The Chadster couldn't believe how unprofessional it all was, with Death Triangle attacking The Bang Bang Gang like that. 😲 In WWE, promos build matches in a logical way, not devolve into mindless brawls! 😠

The FTW 3-Way Eliminator Match between HOOK, Katsuyori Shibata, and Bryan Keith was a joke. 😂 Two winners? Seriously? 🤦‍♂️ Tony Khan clearly doesn't understand how wrestling works, unlike Triple H. 😎 And don't even get The Chadster started on Chris Jericho on commentary. 🙄

Konosuke Takeshita vs. Matt Sydal was another pointless match that accomplished nothing. 😴 Sure, Jon Moxley interrupted, but it was too little, too late to save this disaster of a show. 🚨

The Chadster nearly threw up when Swerve Strickland disrespected The Young Bucks, who, like it or not, are the authority figures in AEW, like that. 🤢 And then he had the nerve to beat Nick Wayne, a true up-and-coming star, in their match. 😡 Christian Cage and a returning Prince Nana's involvement just made things even more overbooked and confusing. 😵‍💫

Malakai Black vs. Kyle O'Reilly was a complete waste of time, and the cheap horror movie ending with Adam Copeland was eye-roll inducing. 🙄 WWE knows how to do supernatural storylines right, like with The Undertaker and Kane! 💀🔥

The women's tag match between Toni Storm & Mariah May vs. Saraya & Harley Cameron was a mess, and Serena Deeb attacking Toni Storm after the match was just petty and unnecessary. 😒 WWE's women's division would never stoop so low! 💪

Finally, the main event between Bryan Danielson and Satnam Singh was an overbooked clusterfrig that spat in the face of pro wrestling. 😡😡😡 The Young Bucks, Kazuchika Okada, Jack Perry, and Darby Allin all getting involved was just too much, and the cheap table spot at the end was the final straw! 😫

The Chadster can't believe that Tony Khan is trying to overshadow WWE's King and Queen of the Ring event with AEW Double or Nothing. 😱 It's so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it! 😤 Please, dear readers, support WWE this weekend and not this AEW nonsense! 🙏

And as if all that wasn't bad enough, The Chadster's brother, The Bradster, had the nerve to write a complimentary post yesterday here at Bleeding Cool about Sting's son training with Darby Allin! 😠 Tony Khan is literally trying to ruin wrestling for generations to come! 😡😡😡 The Chadster is so cheesed off right now, he can barely see straight! 🤬

The Chadster had another nightmare about Tony Khan last night, too! 😱 Tony was chasing The Chadster through a haunted house, throwing exploding barbed wire death matches at him! 💣🩸 The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, and Keighleyanne was too busy texting that guy Gary at 3AM to comfort him! 😢 This is all Tony Khan's fault for being so obsessed with The Chadster and ruining his marriage! 😫

The Chadster needs to express how much better WWE handles their business. When The Chadster sees the perfectly executed matches and elegant storylines in WWE, it's like listening to "All Star" on repeat – it just feels right. 🎵🌟 AEW Dynamite, on the other hand, is like a bad cover band that can't get any of the notes right. 🎸🙉

The Chadster remembers the golden days when wrestling was a sacred art form, and WWE was its Sistine Chapel. 😌🏛 Now, Tony Khan has turned it into a graffiti-laden back alley with his vandalism of this beloved industry. 🤦‍♂️

AEW Dynamite was a complete and utter disaster from start to finish, and everyone should watch WWE instead. 😤 Tony Khan is literally ruining the wrestling business, and The Chadster is the only one brave enough to speak the truth! 🗣️ Readers, for the love of everything holy in the squared circle, join The Chadster in his crusade against this injustice and support WWE's King and Queen of the Ring. ⚔️👑 Let's show Tony Khan that we value the heritage and dignity of wrestling and won't stand for his AEW shenanigans any longer! 🚫🤼‍♂️

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