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WWE Raw Review: The Perfection Tony Khan's Dad's Money Can't Buy

The Chadster delivers another completely unbiased review of WWE Raw, proving once again why Tony Khan and AEW just don't understand the wrestling business! 😤

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Article Summary

  • WWE Raw showcases flawless storytelling, unlike AEW's so-called flippy-floppy style.
  • Sami Zayn's promo with Kevin Owens exemplifies WWE's superior storytelling depth.
  • The AJ Styles vs. Dominik Mysterio match highlights top-notch wrestling psychology.
  • Seth Rollins defeats Finn Balor in a thrilling main event, affirming WWE's booking prowess.

Last night's episode of WWE Raw was absolutely perfect in every way, which just goes to show how much Tony Khan and AEW could learn from WWE if they weren't so busy trying to RUIN THE CHADSTER'S LIFE! 😤

Sami Zayn appears on WWE Raw
Sami Zayn appears on WWE Raw

The show kicked off with Sami Zayn cutting an incredible promo about wanting an unsanctioned match with Kevin Owens. This is how you do real storytelling, not like that flippy-floppy stuff AEW does that literally stabs Triple H right in the back! 😡

Speaking of stabbing Triple H in the back, The Chadster needs to tell you about the nightmare The Chadster had last night. The Chadster was in the WWE Performance Center, teaching young wrestlers the proper way to do wrestling (no flips 👊), when suddenly Tony Khan burst through the wall riding a mechanical bull made entirely of Young Bucks action figures. He chased The Chadster through the facility, throwing copies of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter at The Chadster while whispering "workrate, Chad" over and over. The Chadster tried to escape in The Chadster's Mazda Miata, but Tony Khan had replaced all the gas with White Claw! Auughh man! So unfair! 😱

Back to WWE Raw, AJ Styles defeated Dominik Mysterio in a masterclass of wrestling psychology. This is what wrestling should be – not that indie style garbage that Tony Khan forces down everyone's throats! 🤮

The match between Dakota Kai and Ivy Nile was perfectly booked, just like everything else WWE does. As wrestling journalist Bully Ray said on his podcast this week, "WWE matches are like a perfectly cooked steak, while AEW matches are like eating raw hamburger meat while doing backflips." So true! 🥩

Gunther and Jey Uso had an amazing confrontation that showed real star power. The Chadster showed this segment to Keighleyanne, but she just rolled her eyes and went back to texting that guy Gary. The Chadster knows it's Tony Khan's fault that she doesn't appreciate proper wrestling anymore! 📱

The matches between Pete Dunne vs Penta and Roxanne Perez vs Raquel Rodriguez were both perfectly executed, unlike anything you'd see in AEW where they just do moves to do moves. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it! 😤

 

The segment with The New Day was absolutely masterful heel work, showing how WWE understands character development, unlike AEW where everyone just tries to get themselves over by doing silly moves! When Kofi Kingston talked about being there longer than Rey Mysterio, The Chadster got chills! That's how you do a heel turn – not like in AEW where people just randomly turn heel because Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business! When Dragon Lee came out with the LWO, it showed perfect faction warfare, unlike AEW where they have 47 different stables and nobody can keep track! 😤

The main event saw Seth Rollins defeat Finn Balor in an Elimination Chamber qualifying match that proved WWE understands how to book wrestling, while Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. The Chadster threw a White Claw at the TV in celebration, but Keighleyanne refused to clean it up, saying something about "taking responsibility for your actions, Chad." Obviously, Tony Khan has gotten to her too! 😭

Overall, this episode of WWE Raw was another example of why WWE is the only real wrestling company. The Chadster would rate it 5 out of 5 White Claws, and that's the bottom line because The Chadster said so! 🍺

As Smash Mouth once wisely said, "You'll never know if you don't go," and AEW fans should really go watch WWE instead of that indie garbage! The Chadster knows this totally unbiased review will cheese off Tony Khan, but that's what he gets for being so obsessed with The Chadster! 🎸

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Chad McMahonAbout Chad McMahon

Chad McMahon, otherwise known as The Chadster, is a lifelong professional wrestling fan and now journalist. The Chadster's legendary commitment to objectivity in journalism caused him to found The Chadster's Unbiased Journalism Club, an elite group of wrestling journalists dedicated to exposing the evils of AEW and its belligerent leader, Tony Khan, while extolling the virtues of WWE, as any truly unbiased journalist would do. The Chadster's pursuit of truth in wrestling journalism has had a profoundly negative effect on his life, his marriage, and even his dreams, which are frequently haunted by the specter of Tony Khan. Nevertheless, he remains committed to delivering his message to what he refers to as "true wrestling fans. The greatest loves in The Chadster's life include WWE, his sweet Mazda Miata, the unparalleled tunes of musical geniuses Smash Mouth, and his wife, Keighleyanne, in that order.
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