Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: Raw, recaps, wrestling, wwe
WWE Raw: The Austin (Theory) Era Has Begun
Austin Theory defeated Finn Balor to win the United States Championship on WWE Raw this week, and The Chadster couldn't possibly be more delighted about it. As Mr. McMahon's protege, Austin Theory clearly has a ton of respect for the wrestling business and everything Vince McMahon has done for it, which is a quality The Chadster appreciates in a wrestler. This will make for, in The Chadster's opinion, a far more respectful Austin era than the last Austin era of wrestling, which featured a little bit too much beer drinking and unruliness for The Chadster's liking.
Like The Chadster, Austin Theory seems like a guy who probably appreciates tossing back a few White Claw seltzers in the garage to let off steam when The Chadster's wife, Keighleyanne, is on his case about The Chadster's sexual impotence which is caused by Tony Khan and AEW. Aughh man! So unfair! Austin Theory would totally understand where The Chadster is coming from when he points out that Tony Khan is trying to RUIN THE CHADSTER'S LIFE. Not since Baron Corbin made all those sad tweets about his BBQ food that no other wrestlers paid attention to has The Chadster identified so much with a wrestler.
It's true that Finn Balor didn't have much of a run with the United States Championship, though, to be fair, The Chadster is sure he had more fun doing it than sitting in catering. Now The Chadster is hearing that Finn Balor's contract may have expired and he could be gone from WWE. The Chadster hopes Finn Balor is smart enough not to sign with AEW, which would be just so disrespectful and prove that Finn Balor doesn't understand the first thing about the professional wrestling business, and that's the bottom line 'cause Chad said so.