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X-ual Healing: Acanti Sky-Whales, Brood-Wolves, and Flying Brood-Sharks, Oh My, in Weapon H #3

Sworn to sell comics for Marvel executives who feared and hated the fact that Fox owned their movie rights, The Uncanny X-Men suffered great indignities, but with a corporate merger on the way, the X-Men can finally get back to doing what they do best: being objectively the best franchise in comics.

Each week, armed with the joy, heartbreak, and frustration of 30+ years of reading X-Men comics, we read every new X-book that comes out, recap the events, provide the historical context so you can read it on Marvel Unlimited, and wonder when Marvel will let Chris Claremont write something again.

It's the way X-Men comics were meant to be read! It's the column that can only be known as…

X-ual Healing: Acanti Sky-Whales, Brood-Wolves, and Flying Brood-Sharks, Oh My, in Weapon H #3

For more about the column, check out the reboot issue here.


Weapon H #3

WEAPON H #3
GREG PAK (W) • CORY SMITH (A)
Cover by LEINIL FRANCIS YU
Variant Cover by CORY SMITH
• Weapon H is still on the lam, but that won't stop Roxxon from finding our Hulkverine.
• So who do you send in to root him out?
• Get ready for Weapon H vs.…the Brood!!!
32 PGS./Rated T+ …$3.99

The issue opens in Olympic National Park in Washington State as a howl echoes throughout the forest. Two hikers wonder if they're wolves, but actually, they're… Brood-wolves? Were-brood? Oh, just look at the picture.

X-ual Healing: Acanti Sky-Whales, Brood-Wolves, and Flying Brood-Sharks, Oh My, in Weapon H #3

Shockingly, these brood wolves don't murder these humans or implant them with brood eggs, instead charging right past them. 40 miles west, Weapon H, in human form, is bathing in a lake and calming his mind, the combination of which apparently lets him hide his scent from the wolves. He believes he's lost them and continues on his way.  When he sees a highway sign for Spokane, it triggers a flashback to seven years ago, showing Weapon H and his wife, Sonia, driving past that same sign on their way home from their honeymoon. She thinks he's dead now, and he must allow her to keep believing that for her own safety.

However, in Fort Worth, Texas, Sonia is currently looking for information about her husband, Weapon H, also known as Clay. She locates an old army buddy of his, Anson Davies, and wants to know how he died. Davies questions whether Clay is really dead. He says Clay was reported dead, along with his whole team, in a mission to quell unrest from pipeline workers in Africa on behalf of the Roxxon corporation (who are also behind the Wendigo experiments in previous issues and this Brood business now). Davies says the pipeline workers were nonviolent and implies Roxxon is behind whatever happened to Clay.

At Roxxon's headquarters, a bad guy named Director Agger is annoyed at his subordinates because the Brood-wolves (that's what they're called!) haven't tracked down Weapon H. Roxxon has some kind of vault that's leaking red energy, and they need Weapon H to deal with it before it opens. They decide to lure him into a trap by threatening innocents, a weakness for every hero.

In Roseburg, Oregon, some prisoners are picking up trash on the side of the highway on a work detail when they hear the howl of the Brood-wolves. They attack, but Weapon H saves the day out of nowhere, slicing them up with his claws and demonstrating he can use his claws without going full Hulkverine. He does that a moment later though when one of the Brood's Acanti space-whale airships, arrives flanked by flying Brood warriors. He makes quick work of them, and yes, that includes the flying alien whale ship, which he knocks out with one punch.

X-ual Healing: Acanti Sky-Whales, Brood-Wolves, and Flying Brood-Sharks, Oh My, in Weapon H #3

Next, Roxxon sends flying Brood-sharks (yes, you heard that right), which Weapon H also slices up. The whole time, the Roxxon folks are watching on their monitors, cataloging his fighting style in an attempt to figure out where he received his training. Back in Texas, in a town called Euless, Sonia asks her mother to babysit the kids for a few days, presumably so she can continue to search for the truth about her husband. In Oregon, Weapon H rips a pilot out of the downed Acanti. The pilot tells Weapon H that Roxxon isn't trying to kill him — they want to hire him. Well, they have a funny way of showing it. Besides, Weapon H isn't looking for work. He Hulk-jumps out of there.

Later, Director Agger travels to Texas, where he arrives at the home of Anson Davies, the man Weapon H's wife was talking to earlier in the issue. Davies reaction tells Agger that he's not the first person to come see him. In Redwood National Park, Weapon H is walking through the forest, trying to clear his mind. Roxxon activates a device which summons Man-Thing, or a clone of Man-Thing, or something. Weapon H will face Man-Thing next issue. Also of note, Director Agger takes off his glasses to reveal his eyes glow with red fire, so he's some kind of superbeing.


The Bottom Line

Another fine issue of Weapon H. Yes, the premise is actively stupid, but the creative team makes it work. Also, yes, the storyline kinda sorta rips off the Punisher Netflix show a little bit, but we've got Wendigos, we've got The Brood, and now Man-Thing. What more do you want?!


Further Reading

Want to see Storm of the X-Men merge her body and consciousness with the Acanti Prophet-Singer? Start at Uncanny X-Men #165.

The Brood themselves first appear 10 issues earlier.

Read more X-ual Healing here:

X-ual Healing: Acanti Sky-Whales, Brood-Wolves, and Flying Brood-Sharks, Oh My, in Weapon H #3


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Jude TerrorAbout Jude Terror

A prophecy once said that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero would come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events. Sadly, that prophecy was wrong. Oh, Jude Terror was right. For ten years. About everything. But nobody listened. And so, Jude Terror has moved on to a more important mission: turning Bleeding Cool into a pro wrestling dirt sheet!
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