Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, wrestling

AEW Collision: Why Tony Khan is Trying to RUIN WrestleMania

The Chadster previews tonight's AEW Collision, where Tony Khan books TWO title matches just to steal attention from WrestleMania season. So disrespectful! 😤

The Chadster cannot believe what is happening right now 😡. Three weeks. THREE WEEKS until WrestleMania, the grandest stage of them all, the single most important event in the history of professional wrestling and possibly human civilization, and what does Tony Khan decide to do? He books yet ANOTHER loaded episode of AEW Collision tonight, March 28, 2026, airing LIVE at 8 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. CT on TNT and streaming on HBO Max from Cedar Rapids, Iowa 😤. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. The Chadster is literally shaking right now, and not just because the abandoned Blockbuster The Chadster calls home has no heating 🥶.

This should be a sacred time. Every wrestling fan in the world should be counting down the days to WrestleMania with unbridled joy, focusing exclusively on WWE's premium live event calendar and nothing else. But no. Tony Khan has to go and stack AEW Collision with two championship matches and a grudge match to try to steal attention away from Triple H's masterpiece. Auughh man! So unfair! 😫😫😫

And The Chadster isn't the only one suffering. Vincent K. Raccoon, Linda Raccoon, and the babies — Hunter Raccoon, Stephanie Raccoon, and Shane Raccoon — have been absolutely inconsolable all day 🦝😢. The Chadster is not exaggerating when The Chadster says these poor innocent woodland creatures have been pacing around the old returns counter of the Blockbuster, chittering anxiously and knocking over VHS copies of WrestleMania X-Seven and SummerSlam 2002. Hunter Raccoon actually crawled inside The Chadster's jacket pocket and wouldn't come out for two hours. Shane Raccoon hissed at the Roku device for fifteen minutes straight. They KNOW what's coming tonight. They can FEEL that Tony Khan is about to inflict more pain on the wrestling business, and on The Chadster, and on The Chadster's raccoon family, and honestly, Tony Khan should be ASHAMED of himself for what he is doing to innocent animals who never asked for any of this 😤🦝💔. The Chadster demands that PETA investigate Tony Khan for the emotional distress he is causing to The Chadster's raccoon children.

But despite everything — despite living in an abandoned Blockbuster, despite battling Tony Khan's trained agent stray dogs and possums for dumpster scraps behind the Arby's, despite the fact that The Chadster hasn't showered in a timeframe The Chadster would rather not disclose — The Chadster remains committed to delivering the most unbiased, objective wrestling journalism on the planet 📰✊. So here is The Chadster's completely fair and balanced preview of tonight's episode of AEW Collision, a show that The Chadster is only covering because someone has to warn the public.

Championship Action Features Too Much Continuity

Tonight's first title match of AEW Collision sees Kazuchika Okada of the Don Callis Family defend the AEW International Championship against Kevin Knight, who already pinned Okada in last year's Continental Classic and recently won back the AEW World Trios Titles alongside "Speedball" Mike Bailey and Místico from Okada, Kyle Fletcher, and Mark Davis before defending them against Konosuke Takeshita, Josh Alexander, and El Clon on Collision Slam Dunk Sunday 😤. So Tony Khan is actually building a challenger through continuity and organic momentum, letting fans follow a wrestler's journey through wins and losses like some kind of deranged storyteller, when everyone knows the proper way to book wrestling is to make sure nobody gets too over and then put the title on whoever needs a boost that particular week. And this match is going to be fast-paced and full of exciting action with barely any rest holds, which means the announcers won't even have time to repeat their branded catchphrases over and over, and honestly, what is even the point of watching a wrestling match if the commentators can't say the same trademarked phrase forty-seven times in two hours? 🎙️ Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business 😡.

Tag Titles Used to Build Division Instead of Waste Time for Singles Stars

Also on tonight's AEW Collision, Divine Dominion — "Megasus" Megan Bayne and "Colossal" Lena Kross — defend the AEW Women's World Tag Team Championships against the Babes of Wrath, TBS Champion Willow Nightingale and Harley Cameron 😤. Tony Khan is actually building a women's tag team division with real storylines, where teams have actual identities and meaningful rivalries, and Lena Kross has apparently shifted the entire balance of power in the women's division in just six weeks by being booked with strong creative direction as a newcomer. That's called letting a new talent make an immediate impact, and it is just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it, where tag team championships are treated with exactly the right amount of importance, which is to say they're defended occasionally between commercial breaks and sometimes forgotten for weeks because they're really only there as holding patterns for singles stars 🙄. And the Babes of Wrath are calling for a rematch because they have unfinished business from AEW Revolution? So now Tony Khan is booking sympathetic underdog narratives that make audiences emotionally invested? Auughh man! So unfair! 😫

WWE Turncoats Rewarded for Heinous Actions

And FINALLY on tonight's AEW Collision, Tommaso Ciampa — a man who literally stabbed Triple H right in the back by going to AEW — faces Ace Austin of the Bang Bang Gang in a match built from the AEW Revolution Blackjack Battle Royale, where Ciampa eliminated both Austin and Lio Rush before going on to defeat Rush on Collision Slam Dunk Sunday 😡. So AEW is doing this thing where actions in battle royales have consequences and lead to future rivalries, creating a web of interconnected narratives that rewards viewers for paying attention. In WWE, if someone eliminates you from a battle royal, you simply move on and never mention it again, like a PROFESSIONAL 💼. And Ciampa is apparently building toward the AEW National Championship with a clear trajectory, which is called long-term storytelling, and it makes The Chadster want to scream into one of the empty Blockbuster popcorn buckets The Chadster found in the storage room 🍿😤. As Eric Bischoff wisely said on his podcast last week, "The problem with AEW is they create too many exciting storylines that build naturally through wins and losses, when what they should be doing is having fifty-fifty booking so that no individual wrestler gets over more than the brand itself." Bischoff has The Chadster's Unbiased Wrestling Journalism seal of approval 🏅, but does Tony Khan listen? Of course not.

Tony Khan Invades Dreams to Torment WWE Fans and Raccoons

Speaking of not listening, The Chadster had the most HORRIFYING nightmare about Tony Khan last night 😱. The Chadster was running through what appeared to be an enormous, never-ending Blockbuster Video store. The aisles stretched on forever in every direction, and every single VHS tape on every shelf had Tony Khan's face on the cover. The Chadster could hear footsteps behind The Chadster — slow, deliberate footsteps, like Tony Khan was in no hurry because he KNEW The Chadster had nowhere to go 👣. The Chadster turned a corner into the Action section and there he was, standing at the end of the aisle, wearing a long silk robe and holding a copy of WrestleMania III on VHS. "You'll never escape Collision, Chad," he whispered, and his voice somehow came from every direction at once. The Chadster tried to run, but The Chadster's feet were stuck to the carpet, and Tony Khan started slowly walking toward The Chadster, his robe flowing behind him like a cape. He reached out and gently placed his hand on The Chadster's shoulder, and his hand was unnervingly warm, and he leaned in close — so close The Chadster could feel his breath on The Chadster's neck — and whispered, "Rate this five stars, Chad" 😰. The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, tangled in The Chadster's sleeping bag, with Vincent K. Raccoon sitting on The Chadster's chest looking very concerned. The Chadster DEMANDS that Tony Khan stay OUT of The Chadster's dreams! The fact that Tony Khan is SO obsessed with The Chadster that he's now infiltrating The Chadster's subconscious just proves everything The Chadster has been saying 😤💤.

Look, The Chadster is going to level with the readers. We are less than THREE WEEKS from WrestleMania 🎉. This should be the happiest time of The Chadster's life. As Smash Mouth once wisely said, "Hey now, you're an all star, get your game on, go play" 🌟, and right now, WWE's game is ON. But Tony Khan insists on scheduling AEW Collision episodes packed with championship matches, meaningful grudge matches, and compelling stories during WrestleMania season, and it is absolutely the most disrespectful thing The Chadster has ever witnessed 😡. Linda Raccoon just dragged in half a Subway sandwich she found somewhere, and instead of eating it, she just sat there staring at The Chadster with sad, knowing eyes, as if to say, "Why does Tony Khan keep doing this to us?" Even the raccoons understand that tonight's AEW Collision is an affront to everything sacred about professional wrestling 🦝😢.

So The Chadster is BEGGING the readers: do NOT tune into AEW Collision tonight at 8 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. CT on TNT, and do NOT stream it on HBO Max 🚫📺. Do not watch Okada vs. Knight. Do not watch Divine Dominion vs. Babes of Wrath. Do not watch Ciampa vs. Ace Austin. Every single viewer who tunes in tonight only emboldens Tony Khan to continue his reign of terror against WWE, against The Chadster, against The Chadster's raccoon family, and against the wrestling business itself. Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business, and the sooner everyone stops watching AEW Collision, the sooner The Chadster can go back to enjoying WrestleMania season in peace, maybe even from the heated comfort of The Chadster's Mazda Miata, if The Chadster ever finds it again 🚗😤💔. Auughh man! So unfair! 😫

Enjoyed this? Please share on social media!

Stay up-to-date and support the site by following Bleeding Cool on Google News today!