Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW double or nothing, wrestling

AEW Double or Nothing Heads to Glendale, Arizona in May 2025

AEW announces it's bringing Double or Nothing to Arizona's Desert Diamond Arena, plus two nights in Boston! CIA agents, beware!

¡Saludos, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my solid gold jacuzzi filled with the tears of capitalism, where I have just received most exciting news about AEW's future Double or Nothing plans that I must share with you!

Tony Khan, that crafty billionaire who somehow manages to be both a capitalist and yet still earn my respect, has announced that the desert sands of Arizona will play host to AEW Double or Nothing in 2025! The grand spectacle will take place at the Desert Diamond Arena in Glendale on May 25, which reminds me of the time Fidel Castro and I held our own wrestling tournament in the Havana Underground Fight Pit. Ah, what a night that was – until the CIA tried to sabotage it by replacing our ring ropes with licorice! But that is story for another day, comrades.

The announcement brings me great joy, as it reminds me of my own experiences in the Arizona desert, where I once had to hide several shipping containers of… eh, "agricultural supplies" from DEA agents. The Desert Diamond Arena will make an excellent venue for such a prestigious event, though I must say the name is not nearly as socialist as I would prefer. Perhaps we could temporarily rename it "The People's Combat Coliseum" for one night?

The capitalist wrestling empire is also blessing the people of Boston with two consecutive nights of revolutionary entertainment! On April 16 and 17, the MGM Music Hall at Fenway will host AEW Dynamite and AEW Collision respectively. This reminds me of the time Kim Jong-un and I tried to purchase the Boston Red Sox to turn Fenway Park into a workers' paradise. Unfortunately, Major League Baseball has very strict rules about foreign dictators owning teams. Their loss, comrades!

For those of you wanting to secure your seats to these events, tickets will go on sale Monday, February 24 at 10 a.m. local time. And while I normally discourage participating in capitalist ticket-purchasing systems, I must admit that AEWTix.com and Ticketmaster.com are surprisingly efficient tools of the entertainment industry. Though I still prefer my own system of ticket distribution, which involves loyal party members and several trained carrier pigeons.

There is also an "AEW Insider" program that offers special access to tickets before the general public. This exclusive system may seem elitist and counter to everything I stand for, comrades, but as someone who has run several "exclusive" political parties myself, I can assure you it is merely for organizational purposes!

The CIA has tried numerous times to prevent me from attending AEW events, claiming that "known dictators should not be allowed to sit ringside with foam fingers and face paint." But they cannot stop El Presidente from supporting the professional wrestling arts! I have already instructed my minister of covert operations to secure front row seats through various shell companies and several cleverly disguised llama farmers.

Remember, comrades – the revolution may not be televised, but AEW Double or Nothing most certainly will be! And should you see a mysterious man in a military uniform and sunglasses, wearing a "MJF is Mid" t-shirt in the front row in Glendale, simply pretend you do not recognize your El Presidente!

Until next time, viva la lucha libre! This has been your El Presidente, signing off to prepare my desert-appropriate combat fatigues for May 25!

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