Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, aew rampage, recaps, wrestling

AEW Rampage and AEW Collision Also Happened Last Night

Witness the Chadster's woes as he discusses's the results of AEW Rampage and Collision on the night of CM Punk's WWE return! 🎢🤯

Auughh man! So unfair! 🤦‍♂️ Last night, while the entire wrestling universe was rightfully fixated on WWE's glorious Survivor Series event, Tony Khan had the gaul to run a double-header show with AEW Rampage and AEW Collision. The Chadster feels the need to inform you all about the results, since obviously you were all watching Survivor Series instead. 📺

For those who need to know, FTW Champion HOOK locked horns with Rocky Romero in a display of sheer grappling prowess, eventually securing the victory via ref stoppage with RedRum. 🥋🏆 Kris Statlander overpowered Diamante, and the valiant Willow Nightingale had to save Statlander from a 2-on-1 beatdown post-match. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 🤯💢

The Kingdom blabbered on about #NeckStrengthNovember 🙄 before blindsiding Duke Davis and Danny Jones for a quick and unsportsmanlike win. But, The Chadster cannot ignore how Mike Bennett and Matt Taven talked smack about MJF, which is literally like stabbing Vince McMahon right in the back with their WWE history. 😡🗡️

The ROH Pure Championship main event of AEW Rampage saw Katsuyori Shibata defend against Wheeler Yuta of The Blackpool Combat Club, with Yuta stooping low with a sneaky low blow and a ref distraction to win the title. Those tactics scream that they don't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. 🤦‍♂️🤼‍♂️

Claudio Castagnoli from The Blackpool Combat Club grabbed a decisive win against Daniel Garcia. FTR's Dax Harwood and Cash Wheeler defended themselves against The Righteous and were left confused by an eerie message from House of Black. It was a classic case of smoke and mirrors meant to distract from the fact that this isn't real wrestling. 😒🙄

Malakai Black and Buddy Matthews took on Komander & Gravity in tag action, with The House of Black using their dark mystiques for dominance. Julia Hart retained the TBS Championship against Lady Frost in a House Rules Match—just another gimmick to mask the lack of storytelling. 🙄🤼‍♀️

"Limitless" Keith Lee showcased his power against Lee Moriarty, pouncing his way to victory. The audacity of Keith Lee calling out… well, someone, The Chadster will not speculate here, but it's evident what he's planning. And Eddie Kingston faced the formidable Brody King, with Brody racking up points in the Continental Classic in the AEW Collision main event. Congrats, you just handed another win to the House of Black, Eddie. 😤💔

But wait… Stop the presses! 🚨 The real headline of the night was at Survivor Series where CM Punk, the 'Voice of the Voiceless', returned to the WWE fold. 🎉 This is such a triumph for WWE and a slap in the face to Tony Khan, who clearly couldn't handle Punk's megastar aura. 🤩💥 It's obvious that WWE knows how to cultivate talent while Khan is storing sour grapes. 🍇😤

Yet, The Chadster can't help but feel a tad nervous. Punk's storied past in the locker room is, well, controversial. Could his return cause discord within the sacred halls of WWE? 😬🤔 The Chadster shudders to think… Could this have been part of Tony Khan's master plan all along? To send Punk like a Trojan horse to create chaos in WWE?

No, Tony, no! The Chadster warns you—stop playing these mind games with The Chadster's head. You've already done enough damage, making The Chadster question things at the pinnacle of sports entertainment! The Chadster demands peace of mind! 🚫😡 And The Chadster needs to go for a drive in his reliable Mazda Miata to clear his head, blaring Smash Mouth on the stereo and sipping a calming White Claw. That's how The Chadster will recover from this psychological warfare! 🚗🎶🍹

Stay strong, wrestling fans, and may WWE steer clear of Tony Khan's sinister schemes. The Chadster's well-being depends on it! 🙏💔 #WWEForever #Chadster'sJustice

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