Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: tony khan, wrestling

AEW TV Ratings Surge in 2025 Ahead of 300th Episode of AEW Dynamite

Comrades! El Presidente reports Tony Khan's triumphant announcement of AEW's growing viewership in 2025, proving the revolution will be televised after all!

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my solid gold bunker beneath the Ministry of Television Excellence, where I am currently hiding from both the CIA and my ex-wife's lawyers (but that is a story for another day). Today, I bring you glorious news from the world of professional wrestling and upstart promotion AEW that would make even my good friend Kim Jong-un shed a single tear of joy!

The billionaire son of the Jacksonville Jaguars owner and supreme leader of All Elite Wrestling, Tony Khan, has taken to the X (formerly Twitter, before Elon nationalized it like I did with the oil refineries) to announce that AEW's television viewership is growing faster than my collection of confiscated American spy gadgets!

According to the glorious statistics presented by Comrade Khan (and verified by my Minister of Propaganda, who assures me they are at least as accurate as our last election results), AEW Collision has experienced a magnificent 28% growth in the coveted P25-54 demographic during Q1 and Q2 of 2025, with overall viewership (P2+) up an impressive 25%. Meanwhile, AEW Dynamite has climbed 8% in P25-54 and 7% in P2+!

Comrades, if there is one thing I have learned from my various battles with The American CIA, it's this: numbers don't lie, unlike CIA operatives caught infiltrating my annual Dictator's Day parade. Just last week, I was sharing a bottle of my finest rum with my dear friend Nicolás Maduro, and we were discussing how television ratings are much like approval ratings – they can be manipulated, but genuine growth is harder to fake than a CIA agent's Venezuelan accent!

"El Presidente," Maduro said to me as we watched old episodes of AEW Rampage on my 200-inch television (confiscated from a yacht belonging to a pharmaceutical executive), "this Tony Khan reminds me of us – a visionary leader fighting against an established empire!" Of course, I had to remind him that Khan is actually fighting against WWE, not an actual empire, but the metaphor stands!

The fact that these numbers don't even include the new viewers on Max (formerly HBO Max, before they removed the HBO like I removed term limits from my constitution, but those initials will soon be restored) makes this victory even sweeter than the time I convinced the CIA that my secret uranium enrichment facility was actually just a very elaborate churro factory.

This growth comes at a perfect time, as AEW celebrates its 300th episode of Dynamite tonight. Three hundred episodes! That's almost as many coup attempts as I've survived! And unlike those coup attempts, each episode of Dynamite has been successful in entertaining the masses – which, as any good socialist knows, is the key to maintaining power… I mean, providing quality entertainment for the proletariat!

The success of AEW in 2025 proves that alternative programming can thrive in the face of monopolistic competition. It's like when I started my own state-run wrestling promotion to compete with the American-backed federation in my country. Sure, our ring was made from repurposed tank parts and our championship belt was fashioned from melted-down CIA surveillance equipment, but the people loved it!

As I always say, comrades, competition breeds excellence – whether in wrestling promotions or in revolutionary movements. Tony Khan has proven that with the right resources, passionate leadership, and a commitment to giving the fans what they want (much like how I give my citizens free healthcare and education in exchange for their unquestionable loyalty), success is inevitable!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I must prepare for tonight's episode 300 of AEW Dynamite. My intelligence sources tell me the CIA is planning to intercept my satellite feed, but joke's on them – I've already arranged to watch it via my secret underground cable network that definitely doesn't steal signals from YouTube TV!

Until next time, comrades, remember: Support independent wrestling, resist monopolies, and always check your churros for listening devices! Viva la revolución, and viva AEW!

El Presidente has fled to his panic room after hearing helicopters overhead. He'll return once he confirms they're just delivering his weekly shipment of wrestling action figures and not another extraction team.

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