Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, back once again to review MTV's weekly "Jerzday" offerings. Double Shot at Love Season 3 Episode 2, titled "Say Hello to My Ex, Maria," delivered the season's first guest star, Vinny's titular ex, Maria. The show also resolved the worrisome cliffhanger of the first episode, which saw Vinny seemingly break down during the elimination and walk off the set. As it turns out, the reason Vinny got upset was that he didn't feel he knew any of the girls well enough to eliminate someone, so he canceled the elimination the first night.
The next morning, Vinny took Kortni out for coffee where they got to talking about something they both enjoy: pornography. Kortni finds Vinny comforting and easy to talk to. Vinny just likes talking about porno. You know who is exactly the same way? Putin. I know, comrades, he seems like he would be a very vanilla dude, but you wouldn't believe some of the stuff he's into. Let's just say there's a good reason the Russian government pours billions each year into tentacle research, comrades. Haw haw haw haw!
After the date, Vinny arrived back at the suite to an apologetic Pauly and the revelation that Nikki invited Maria to spend a day with the group. Vinny was concerned, probably because if Maria were to stick around too long, he would end up making out with her instead of hitting on the rest of the cast. Comrades, if my ex tried something like that, I would definitely have her locked away in the dungeon for the rest of her life, but I guess they do things differently on Staten Island. But Maria promised she was only there to provide support for Vinny in his reality show dating endeavors.
Speaking of which, Vinny scored his first kiss of the season, making out briefly with Akielia. While that was going on, the girls were starting drama. Claudelia let slip to Jasmine that Honey was talking trash about her (which may or may not have been true), and that led to Jasmine trying to step to both Honey and Peachy, though Jasmine would later apologize to both during a group dinner. You should never apologize, comrade Jasmine. It shows weakness. If I apologized after every failed coup attempt, where would I be today?
As the end of the episode neared, Vinny invited Jasmine, Erica (with a C, not Erika with a K), Kyra, and Kiani to dinner to get to know them better. But it was also a secret elimination dinner. Vinny ended up keeping Jasmine and Erica, complimenting their fiery personalities, and eliminating Kyra, who believed she had a deep connection with Vinny but didn't let Vinny in on that fact, and Kiana, who bonded more with Maria than anyone else and, shockingly, didn't see the elimination coming in her tarot card readings.
Of all the Jersey Shore family reality shows happening this year, Double Shot at Love seems the most natural in its format, which, unlike the party house atmosphere of Jersey Shore and Floribama Shore (or Double Shot at Love Season 2), does not rely at all on the interaction between the cast and the general public. Instead, all of the action is meant to take place on the set between Vinny, his co-hosts Pauly and Nikki, and the contestants. By bringing in guest stars (presumably with strict COVID protocols), the show gives off the illusion of normalcy where the other shows feel a little bit more cramped and forced. It was nice to see Maria again, and the personalities of the current season's contestants are beginning to shine through.
Until next time, my friends: socialism or death!