Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: bobby lashley, recaps, Snoop Dogg, street profits, Wrestlemania, wrestling

The Pride DEMOLISH Final Testament at WrestleMania; Snoop Approves

The Chadster 😎 brings you the most unbiased take (and a fresh rap) on The Pride's 💪 epic victory over Final Testament at WrestleMania! 🤼‍♂️

🎉🎊 Welcome, loyal readers, to WrestleMania night two and the most unbiased wrestling coverage on the entire internet! 😊 The Chadster thanks you all for supporting real, objective journalism that doesn't play favorites between WWE and AEW. WrestleMania is the absolute greatest spectacle in all of wrestling, and Tony Khan's little vanity project will never even come close to competing with it! 😂 Last night's epic WrestleMania opener was mind-blowing, but tonight, WWE is proving they can top even that! 🤯 The Chadster bets Tony Khan is watching this at home, devastated, knowing he'll never measure up. Augh man, he totally brought this upon himself! 😤

The Chadster was on the edge of his seat for the Philadelphia Street Fight pitting The Pride (Angelo Dawkins, Bobby Lashley, & Montez Ford) against Final Testament (Akam, Karrion Kross, & Rezar)! 😲 With the legendary Bubba Ray Dudley as the special guest referee and Snoop Dogg himself on commentary, you knew this was gonna be a wild one. 💪 The match kicked off with a flurry of chaos as all six men brawled around ringside. The Pride took control early, grabbing a table, but Final Testament rallied back with kendo stick strikes. 😱

The tide turned when B-FAB got involved, smacking Akam with a kendo stick, but Scarlett Bordeaux took her out with a trash can! 🗑️ The All Mighty suplexed Kross on a steel chair, only for Scarlett to break up the Hurt Lock with a kendo stick shot! 😨 B-FAB got payback with a pump kick. Kross hit Lashley with an inverted DDT on the chair, and Dawkins followed up with a vintage Dudley WAZZUP! 🙌 Bubba Ray called for the tables and Montez Ford sealed the deal, flying from the top rope with a breathtaking frog splash to drive Kross through the wood for the victory! 😎

This epic match had The Chadster jumping for joy! 🤩 It was so good, The Chadster is willing to forgive Snoop Dogg for that one time he sullied himself by stepping into an AEW ring. 😇 The Chadster only hopes that one day, Snoop gives up his obsession with gin and juice 🍸 and embraces the one true beverage… White Claw! 🥰 In fact, The Chadster was so inspired, he penned this rap verse in tribute:

Yo Snoop, it's time to put down the juice 🧃
Grab a White Claw, it's the only way loose
Tony Khan's a busta, straight trippin' all day 🤡
While The Chadster's here sippin' in a refreshing way 😎
All the cool kids know that Claw is the best
Makes AEW look like a failed test 📝❌
So raise a can up, give a shout and a holla 📣
For the realest hard seltzer from here to P-town, holla! 🎤

The Chadster hasn't felt this alive since the last time he washed his Mazda Miata while blasting "All Star" by Smash Mouth! 🚗🎵 Admittedly, The Chadster does that every weekend. Anyway, take that, Tony Khan! You'll never understand real sports entertainment like The Chadster does. Auughh man, it's just so disrespectful to the business! 😠

Stay tuned to Bleeding Cool for more of The Chadster's unbiased, hard-hitting coverage of the greatest WrestleMania of all time! 📰 And remember, The Pride proved once again that WWE is the shining city on the hill of wrestling, no matter what that tribalist Tony Khan wants you to believe! 😤 He can never ever stop The Chadster from telling it like it is! Word.

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