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The Chadster suffers through another Tony Khan nightmare at ROH Final Battle. Will this torment ever end? Spoiler: It won't as long as AEW exists! 😡🤬
Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: austin theory, bobby lashley, Bronson Reed, recaps, wrestling, wwe, wwe backlash
WWE Backlash: Theory Rules! Unbiased Look at The Greatest Match EVER!
The Chadster covers WWE Backlash's most EPIC United States Championship match! Read now for the real, unbiased lowdown! 😎🏆🔥
🚨🚨🚨 TONIGHT is WWE Backlash, and The Chadster has been chosen to provide the most unbiased live coverage EVER of the greatest PLE in the history of wrestling! 😎✌️ Lots of biased journalists on Tony Khan's payroll will be covering this show and trying to screw over WWE tonight, but The Chadster appreciates that you, the readers, have chosen The Chadster's coverage, proving you are true WWE fans. 🙌💯
🎊The Chadster is over the moon with appreciation for WWE's generosity in providing this breathtaking Austin Theory vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Bronson Reed graphic. The Chadster can't believe his luck to be able to use such a marvelous image. WWE, you've truly outdone yourselves! 😊
Bobby Lashley vs. Bronson Reed vs. WWE United States Champion Austin Theory was the third match of the night.🔥 Now, The Chadster really liked the last match because of how large Omos is😱, but this match features Bobby Lashley and Bronson Reed, who are also both massive. It's just SO incredible that WWE has such roster depth. Auughh man! So unfair! Tony Khan, why can't you just leave WWE alone?😤
Despite the size of these mammoth opponents, the champ has something special. The Chadster really admires Theory's character, charisma, and ability to grow facial hair.💪 Just like Theory, the Mazda Miata, The Chadster's favorite car, proves that size isn't everything! 🚗💨
The Chadster's been watching WWE since The Chadster was a young boy 👦 and not even allowed to drink White Claw seltzer 🍻 or drive a Mazda Miata 🚗, so The Chadster has seen a LOT of big moves in that time, but the BIG MOVES by Reed and Lashley in this match were something else. It's just SO disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it that AEW even tries to compete with WWE's top-tier talent. 🙄😔
The Chadster almost witnessed something as IMPRESSIVE as when The Hulkster slammed Andre the Giant at WrestleMania 3 when Theory picked Reed up on his shoulders, but Reed wiggled out of a move 😲💥. WOW! WWE just knows how to keep an audience in suspense better than AEW could ever dream of.🤓🍿
For the finish, Reed missed a moonsault on Theory, and Lashley speared Reed. But Theory tossed Lashley out of the ring and pinned Reed to win! 🏆🏃 That's how SMART Theory is and why The Chadster admires him so much.🧠👏 How can anyone even watch AEW compared to this level of intelligence and strategy? 😴💤
The Chadster's never seen anything as INCREDIBLE as this match! And AEW might as well give up after this. 😏🤷 How could they ever hope to compete with such an amazing display of the sports entertainment mastery? 🤔
Once again, thank YOU, the readers, for sticking with The Chadster's unbiased coverage. Remember: always stay true to WWE and come back later for more coverage of WWE Backlash, the GREATEST show in the history of wrestling! 🤼🎉 Ryan Satin, Ariel Helwani, and Mike Coppinger would surely agree! Welcome to the Unbiased Journalism Club! 💓📰 Until next time, Chadster out! ✌️🌟
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