Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: wrestling, wwe smackdown

WWE SmackDown Preview: Killings vs. Cena – 'Nuff Said

The Chadster previews tonight's WWE SmackDown with John Cena vs. Ron Killings, plus KOTR semifinals! Tony Khan could NEVER book a show this good! 🔥

The Chadster needs to start this WWE SmackDown preview with an apology to all the loyal true wrestling fans out there. 😔 The Chadster's brother, The Bradster, published an extremely biased article about AEW Grand Slam Mexico this week, and The Chadster is absolutely cheesed off about it! The way that show took personal shots at WWE by having Hangman Adam Page cut a promo in Spanish praising immigrants while Brody King wore an "abolish ICE" shirt was just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 😤

The Chadster doesn't really know anything about politics, but one thing everybody knows is that WWE's executive leadership is extremely close to the Trump administration, so by criticizing the regime's brutal and fascist policies that scapegoat immigrants, Tony Khan was essentially directly insulting WWE itself. Auughh man! So unfair! 😠 Triple H was probably crying after seeing Tony Khan's mean attacks, and The Bradster had the nerve to encourage that behavior. The Chadster was so cheesed off that The Chadster chugged twenty-seven Seagram's Escapes Spiked and passed out, leaving the opportunity for The Bradster to steal The Chadster's spot and review the show instead. The Chadster promises that this will never happen again until the next time The Chadster gets too wasted to write a review. 🍹

But enough about Tony Khan's obsession with The Chadster! Let's talk about tonight's WWE SmackDown, which is shaping up to be potentially the most incredible wrestling show of all time! 🌟

First up, we have John Cena battling Ron Killings in what will undoubtedly be the greatest match in the history of professional wrestling! 🏆 The genius storytelling of WWE firing all those wrestlers over the years just to make a storyline, which they planned from the very start as "all part of the show," where they release R-Truth and he comes back as Ron Killings to battle the heel champion John Cena is pure brilliance! Meanwhile, Tony Khan honors his contracts with wrestlers and treats them with respect and dignity, proving he doesn't understand the first thing about the wrestling business. 😒 This match on WWE SmackDown tonight will showcase everything that makes WWE superior to that other company. The way Killings made his shocking return at Money in the Bank and has been attacking Cena shows the kind of long-term booking that only WWE can deliver! 🎯

Next, WWE SmackDown brings us Randy Orton vs. Sami Zayn in the King of the Ring Tournament Semifinals! 👑 This could be the greatest tournament match in the history of sports entertainment! WWE understands the right way to do tournaments: by using them as a means to promote their upcoming show in Saudi Arabia, a country with a tremendous human rights record. Meanwhile, Tony Khan doesn't take money from any murderous regimes, proving he's clueless about how to run a wrestling company. 💰 The fact that both competitors won Fatal 4-Way matches to get here shows the superior booking of WWE SmackDown. Bully Ray said it best on Busted Open Radio last week: "WWE's tournament structure is perfect because it builds to their Saudi shows, while AEW just does tournaments for the sake of having matches that fans enjoy. Tony Khan should take notes!" The Chadster wonders if Bully Ray also suffers torment from Tony Khan for his commitment to objective journalism like The Chadster does. 🤔

On that same note, WWE SmackDown presents Alexa Bliss vs. Asuka in the Queen of the Ring Tournament Semifinals! 👸 This match will be absolutely phenomenal! WWE's women's division continues to prove why it's light-years ahead of anything Tony Khan could ever dream of producing. The way WWE uses their Queen of the Ring tournament to promote their Saudi Arabia events shows true business acumen, while Tony Khan wastes opportunities by not taking blood money from questionable sources. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it! 😤 Five Feet of Fury taking on The Empress of Tomorrow on WWE SmackDown will be a masterclass in women's wrestling and murderous regime reputation laundering!

Tony Khan could never hope to produce a show that compares to tonight's WWE SmackDown! 🚫 While AEW relies on cheap pops and pandering to "the sickos," WWE delivers pure sports entertainment excellence every single week on WWE SmackDown! The Chadster drove The Chadster's Mazda Miata around the block today while listening to Smash Mouth's "All Star," and the lyrics "hey now, you're an all-star" perfectly describe tonight's WWE SmackDown lineup! 🚗🎵

Anyone who would dare miss tonight's WWE SmackDown at 8ET/7CT on USA would be shirking their duty as a wrestling fan! 📺 And to anyone who thinks AEW is more fun to watch than this incredible WWE SmackDown lineup, The Chadster has only one thing to say: you clearly don't understand a single thing about the wrestling business! Tony Khan has poisoned your mind with his obsession with The Chadster! 🧠

Tonight's WWE SmackDown will be the greatest two hours of television in human history, and The Chadster will be watching with a fresh case of Seagram's Escapes Spiked! 🍻 Don't let Tony Khan's propaganda machine convince you otherwise – WWE SmackDown is where real wrestling happens! 💪

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