Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, wrestling

AEW Collision Preview: A Transparent Attempt to Generate PPV Buys

😤 Tony Khan's latest AEW Collision is LITERALLY CHEESING THE CHADSTER OFF with its blatant attempt to trick viewers into watching Dynasty! So unfair to WWE! 🤬

Auughh man! So unfair! 😠 Tonight's episode of AEW Collision is airing, and The Chadster is already feeling some kind of way about it. The audacity of AEW Collision to continue trying to compete with WWE just cheeses The Chadster right off! It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 🤬 But, for the sake of unbiased wrestling journalism, The Chadster is putting his bias aside (as he always does) to give readers a preview of tonight's AEW Collision.

First, we've got a match featuring the Don Callis Family vs. Powerhouse Hobbs & Tomohiro Ishii. 🤔 If Tony Khan really understood anything about the wrestling business, he would know that cobbling together matches like this does nothing but confuse the fans. WWE knows the value of carefully planned and predictable storylines, but here we are with AEW throwing together a match where these two big guys team up against the team of Takeshita and Fletcher. Is this match going to provide the drama and excitement of a well-controlled WWE match? Of course, not! 👎

Next up, a singles match with Cash Wheeler vs. PAC. Now, really, what's the point? Cash Wheeler is diving into singles competition for, like, the first time in forever. And how does he think he's going to match up against PAC, who doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business and who is 41-12-2 in singles competition this year alone?! 😝 Come on, Cash, The Chadster knows this is all about trying to trick fans into wanting to see Rated FTR vs. The Death Riders at AEW Dynasty. You aren't fooling anyone!

Then, there's CRU vs. Top Flight. How many times do we have to go through this grudge match nonsense? 🤦‍♂️ Compared to WWE, this is just another cheap attempt at creating drama. CRU and Top Flight have been fighting it out for weeks, which is not long enough for a proper rivalry. WWE creates enduring storylines that captivate and engage, while AEW just has wrestlers do flips in the ring expects everyone to clap like trained monkeys. 🙄 If Tony Khan only followed WWE's superior practice of piping in crowd noise, then he wouldn't have to try so hard to please the fans.

Next on the card, it's Speedball Mike Bailey vs. Dralistico, with RICOCHET ON COMMENTARY. Let's be honest here. Speedball is new, and Dralistico's part of LFI should be making more of an impact instead of participating in matches like this. WWE would never waste such potential. The Chadster might be tempted to hurl a White Claw seltzer at the TV when this segment comes on, but with all the stains, Keighleyanne would be even more annoyed with The Chadster. 😧 Thanks a lot, Tony Khan!

AEW's plans to trick people into being excited for AEW Dynasty has come for the womens' division too, with Mercedes Moné & Harley Cameron up against Athena & Julia Hart in a preview of the Owen Hart Foundation Tournament. When former WWE stars join AEW, it's like they've literally stabbed Triple H right in the back. 😡 In WWE, women pay their dues the right way by coming up through the NXT developmental system. Julia Hart and Harley Cameron have never even been in NXT, and Monè and Athena stabbed NXT in the back.

There are two other women's matches on the show too, which is so disrespectful to WWE, which only featured one women's match on WWE SmackDown last night. Tony Khan is clearly trying to prove that AEW has a better women's division than WWE and that's just so dang unfair! 😤 Jamie Hayter will take on Billie Starks while Kris Statlander takes on Thunder Rosa in first round Owen Hart tournament matches.

Speaking of the Owen Hart tournament, Jay White will be on the show, probably to address why he'll have to miss the tournament due to an injury. This is just so disrespectful to WWE, which featured Kevin Owens announcing he'll have to miss WrestleMania due to an injury last night on WWE Smackdown. Tony Khan, stop copying WWE by having your wrestlers get injured! Auughh man! 🤬

Lastly, there's Max Caster, who's up to his usual antics. If the idea is to embarrass himself on the microphone yet again, then The Chadster has to wonder why anyone bothers tuning in. Caster's constant challenges are desperate attempts at generating interest, and it's clear that compared to WWE's strategy for stars, Tony Khan has no understanding of how to do it properly.

💔 Speaking of Tony Khan, last night, The Chadster was once again haunted by a Tony Khan nightmare, inspired by the preview of tonight's AEW Collision. Beautiful weather awaited The Chadster as he wandered along a well-manicured trail in a serene park. But then, out of nowhere, Tony Khan appeared from behind the trees, twirling a microphone like a lasso. The Chadster ducked as White Claw infused snow cones suddenly rained down like snowflakes, staining The Chadster's WWE merch. The Chadster ran for shelter, but Tony Khan caught up, looming ever closely with the shadow of a monstrous AEW logo hovering above him. Tony Khan, with a mischievous wink, vanished just as The Chadster tried to plead for him to stop haunting The Chadster's slumber.

So, true wrestling fans, The Chadster advises you to avoid AEW Collision tonight at 8/7C on TNT and simulcast on MAX. It will only embolden Tony Khan in his quest against all things WWE. 🛑 Stop letting AEW mess with the sanctity of your wrestling fandom. Join The Chadster in asking Tony Khan to stop being so obsessed with The Chadster and get out of The Chadster's dreams—and viewers' lives! 😤

Stay tuned for updates, should The Chadster survive yet another night of Tony Khan antics. 😥

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