Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, wrestling

AEW Collision Preview: Twas The Night Before Revolution

El Presidente previews tonight's AEW Collision from his luxury bunker, the final stop before Revolution, with lucha libre and CIA stories aplenty!

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxury bunker beneath the presidential palace, where I am currently watching tape of lucha libre matches while my security team sweeps for CIA listening devices hidden in my wrestling action figures. Again. And I have some tremendously exciting news for you tonight regarding AEW Collision!

AEW Collision airs TONIGHT from San Jose, California, and comrades, this is the final stop before tomorrow's AEW Revolution pay-per-view spectacular! This reminds me of the time I was having drinks with my good friend Kim Jong-un, and he told me, "Presidente, the night before a big event is like the calm before the storm." Then we launched fireworks, except he actually launched missiles. Different approaches, same festive spirit!

But enough about my diplomatic adventures! Let us talk about the glorious workers' revolution happening in the squared circle tonight!

AEW National Champion Ricochet and his stable The Demand will face the Bang Bang Gang in trios action! Comrades, this is brilliant strategy from Ricochet, getting some final tune-up before his 21-Man Blackjack Battle Royale tomorrow at Revolution. You know, the CIA once tried to eliminate me using a similar battle royale format at a United Nations cocktail party. I survived by forming a temporary alliance with several other world leaders, then betraying them at the last moment. It is good to see Ricochet is also surrounding himself with allies in Toa Liona and Bishop Kaun. Trust no one, comrade Ricochet, but especially not Austin Gunn, Ace Austin, and Juice Robinson!

The main attraction tonight features Andrade El Ídolo taking on Máscara Dorada in what promises to be a spectacular lucha showcase! This is the perfect preparation for Andrade before he faces ROH World Champion Bandido tomorrow at Revolution. Ah, the beauty of lucha libre! This reminds me of when I attended a masked wrestling tournament in Mexico City with Fidel Castro back in the 1980s. Fidel became so invested in the drama that he tried to jump into the ring to help his favorite luchador. Security had to restrain him! The passion, comrades! The pageantry!

Of course, both men are connected to the Don Callis Family, which means Don Callis is probably pulling strings like a corrupt political machine. I respect this tremendously, as it reminds me of how I run my own cabinet meetings!

AEW Women's World Champion Thekla will team with Triangle of Madness partners Skye Blue and Julia Hart in trios action tonight. The Toxic Spider is preparing for her 2-out-of-3 Falls defense against Kris Statlander tomorrow, and we will also hear from Statlander herself on Collision! Comrades, a 2-out-of-3 Falls match is like when the CIA tries to overthrow you multiple times. You must be prepared to win more than once! I have survived seven coup attempts, which means I am ready for a best-of-thirteen if necessary!

Kevin Knight faces El Clon tonight, with Knight preparing for the AEW World Trios Championship match tomorrow alongside Speedball Mike Bailey and Místico against more of the Don Callis Family. The Jet must be careful, comrades! El Clon is unpredictable, much like my former Minister of Agriculture, who once tried to solve a food shortage by declaring potatoes illegal. Different kind of unpredictable, but you understand my point!

The colossal Lena Kross takes on Mina Shirakawa tonight! Kross has the most ambitious weekend of anyone, with shots at both the TBS Championship and the AEW Women's World Tag Team Titles tomorrow at Revolution. This is like when I once scheduled a state dinner, a military parade, AND a telenovela marathon all in the same evening. Ambitious? Yes! Exhausting? Absolutely! But that is what separates the champions from the pretenders, comrades!

And finally, AEW World Trios Champion Mark Davis battles Komander in what should be a fascinating clash of styles before the Don Callis Family defends those titles tomorrow.

Comrades, AEW Collision airs tonight at 8 PM Eastern Time on TNT and HBO Max! Do not miss it, unless you are too busy dismantling CIA surveillance equipment in your personal theater. In that case, DVR it like I will be doing!

¡Viva la revolución! ¡Viva la lucha libre!

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