Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, aew rampage, recaps, wrestling

AEW Collision & Rampage Review: A Blatant Commercial for AEW Dynasty

Discover why AEW Collision and AEW Rampage were absolute disasters and how WWE does it right every time! 🤼‍♂️👎 #WWEForever

Auughh man! So unfair! 🤬 The Chadster just watched the worst two back-to-back episodes of televised so-called "wrestling" that he's ever seen in his life, and that's really saying something considering some of the other dreck that AEW Collision and AEW Rampage have subjected The Chadster to. 😤 Once again, Tony Khan has proven that he doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business, unlike the geniuses in WWE Creative. 🧠 And all of this was so obviously just a cheap attempt to get people to buy AEW Dynasty on PPV tonight. WWE sells PPVs by their name alone, but Tony Khan has to resort to its matches to sell the show. So pathetic!

First off, the trios match between Adam Copeland, Mark Briscoe, & Eddie Kingston vs. Action Andretti & Top Flight was a complete mess. 🙄 Too many flips and dives with no psychology. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. And then The House of Black had to show up and ruin everything, as usual. 🤦‍♂️

Speaking of ruining everything, Powerhouse Hobbs with his manager Don Callis took on some poor jobber named CJ Esparza in a complete squash match. 😴 Wow, way to build up your talent, Tony Khan. In WWE, every match matters and every superstar is made to look like a star. 🌟

Chris Jericho cut a promo on HOOK, challenging him for the FTW Championship at AEW Dynasty tonight. 🎤 Look, The Chadster respects everything Chris Jericho has done for the business, but he's really stabbing Triple H right in the back by working with this mudshow indie company. 😞 The Chadster thinks it's time for Jericho to hang up his boots… and then return to WWE and get new, better boots.

The tag match between The Acclaimed and The Gunns was a complete joke. 😂 Tony Khan had to threaten The Gunns to prevent them from walking out? Wow, great job creating a positive work environment, Tony. 👎 And of course, The Gunns had to cheat to win because AEW can't book a clean finish to save their lives. 🙄

The Chadster was subjected to a "Bunkhouse Brawl" between The Blackpool Combat Club and members of The Don Callis Family. 🤼‍♂️ Weapons everywhere, blood all over the place… it was just gratuitous violence for the sake of it. The Chadster much prefers the sophisticated storytelling and family-friendly entertainment that WWE provides. 😇

Skye Blue took on Leyla Hirsch in a match that would never happen in WWE because all of WWE's female superstars are so much more talented than the AEW women's roster. Unless of course Blue or Hirsch come to their senses and join WWE, in which case The Chadster believes their talent would suddenly grow. Tony Khan once again shows he doesn't know how to book compelling women's matches. 🤡

The main event trios match was at least decent from an in-ring perspective, but The Elite losing to Pac and FTR? 😲 Way to bury your top stars, Tony Khan. In WWE, the top guys always go over because that's how you create larger-than-life superstars. 🦸‍♂️

Over on Rampage, the 420 Four-Way match was a complete joke and an insult to the wrestling business. 🍃 This whole show felt like Tony Khan desperately throwing everything at the wall to pop a rating and trick people into buying the PPV. 🎣 The Chadster doesn't get why there needs to be a day to celebrate marijuana cigarette smoking. Where is White Claw day?! The Chadster bets Tony Khan has something to do with that.

And then there was the match between Yuka Sakazaki and Emi Sakura, which was about as exciting as watching paint dry. 😒 Sakura chopping Sakazaki? Yuka connecting with a sliding lariat? Please. The Chadster sees more thrilling action when he's driving his Mazda Miata – which, by the way, is a much better use of The Chadster's time. 🚗 Yuka with the ropes and a German Suplex? 🤼 Every single move looked like they were taken right out of a video game, and not in a good way. 🎮 It's corner-cutting booking like this that just proves Tony Khan doesn't actually care about creating logical and emotionally invested storylines the way WWE does. 😡 The Chadster couldn't be more cheesed off unless Tony Khan himself came to The Chadster's house and spilled his White Claw seltzer (which The Chadster thinks is a legitimate possibility). 🍹

The Chadster was actually relieved when Angelo Parker came out to announce his retirement because it meant one less person in AEW. 😌 But then Tony Khan had to book some unrealistic pregnancy angle with Ruby Soho? 🤰 Talk about jumping the shark. 🦈 The Chadster can't believe Tony Khan would force his superstars to get pregnant just for an angle. How desperate!

And the most unfair ending fittingly graced this show! 🤬 The Chadster had to endure the absolute travesty of a main event on Rampage where Kyle O'Reilly, Rocky "Azucar" Romero, and "Daddy Magic" Matt Menard defeated the so-called Undisputed Kingdom—AEW International Champ Roderick Strong, & ROH World Tag Team Champs The Kingdom—Matt Taven & Mike Bennett. 🤼‍♂️ Seriously, doing flips and arm drags like they're out of style! A moonsault for a near fall? 🌙 Could Tony Khan book a show without acrobatics? And talk about predictable: Kyle O'Reilly scores a submission victory with an arm bar – it's like Tony Khan doesn't want to present any originality. 👎 And then, Kyle had the audacity to trash talk Strong after the match, acting like he already owns the International Championship. Talk about counting your chickens before they hatch! 🐣 It's enough to make The Chadster spit out his White Claw seltzer in disgust! The Chadster bets Triple H wouldn't ever allow such nonsensical ranting in WWE, where champions carry themselves with decorum and class. 🍷👔

Folks, The Chadster is begging you, if you have any respect for the wrestling business, do not give in to Tony Khan's tricks. 🙏 Do not purchase AEW Dynasty under any circumstances. Instead, go watch literally anything from WWE and cleanse your palate of this sports entertainment abomination. 🤢 Trust The Chadster, you'll be much happier and well-adjusted as a human being. just like The Chadster. 😊

Tony Khan has to be working with the devil because he somehow keeps producing show after show that is perfectly designed to cheese off The Chadster. 👿 It's like he has a personal vendetta against The Chadster and is booking AEW specifically to torment him. But The Chadster will not be broken! 💪 The Chadster will continue to watch every episode of this stuff, no matter how bad it gets, to bring you, the good readers, the truth about how terrible AEW is and how it's ruining the business. 🗞️ Because that's what unbiased journalists like The Chadster do. 😤

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