Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew, Rampage, recaps, wrestling

AEW Rampage: 6 Lowlights from the Blackest of Fridays

The nightmare is finally over, and The Chadster still survives! This was one of the most difficult weeks The Chadster has ever experienced. Not only did Tony Khan and AEW ruin The Chadster's Thanksgiving with the episode of AEW Dynamite that aired the night before, but they also ruined The Chadster's Black Friday with a special episode of AEW Rampage. The Chadster has been through a lot these last few days, but it's finally over and The Chadster can look forward to tonight's Survivor Series. But first, The Chadster has to get through this recap of the events of AEW Rampage that he is being forced to write against his will by the management of Bleeding Cool, who are obviously on Tony Khan's payroll.

The Chadster begged and pleaded with his superiors at Bleeding Cool, but they wouldn't budge. "You have to recap Rampage," they said. "It's your job." The Chadster tried to explain that he was suffering from emotional distress after having to sit through Dynamite two nights earlier, but they wouldn't listen. "You're just going to have to suck it up and do your job," they said. The Chadster was in a state of pure panic as he sat down to watch AEW Rampage. He knew that Tony Khan was out to get him, and he was sure that the show would be full of lowlights that would make The Chadster's life even more difficult. He was right. The show was a complete disaster, and The Chadster has compiled a list of the six worst moments from the blackest of Fridays.

FTR Defeats Top Flight on AEW Rampage

FTR is a very popular tag team, so one thing The Chadster thinks Tony Khan has been doing right has been keeping them off TV. The AEW audience doesn't deserve to watch wrestlers they like wrestle. But Tony Khan must have realized The Chadster agrees with that booking decision because he threw FTR into a match with Top Flight on Rampage, which FTR won. Auuughh man!

Claudio Castagnoli Obtains an ROH Championship Rematch

If there's one thing The Chadster feels professional wrestling needs less of, it's great wrestling matches. Great wrestling matches cause the fans to expect too much, and then they don't appreciate the sports entertainment WWE provides. So The Chadster is not happy to hear that Chris Jericho will defend the ROH Championship against Claudio Castagnoli again. So unfair!

Toni Storm Discusses Losing the Women's Title on AEW Rampage

Toni Storm is annoyed because she was forced to carry the Interim Women's Championship while Jamie Hayter gets to be the real women's champion. The Chadster has an idea: nobody should be the champion, and AEW should just shut down for good!

Darby Allin Defeats Anthony Henry on AEW Dynamite

If there's one thing The Chadster can't stand, it's AEW. If there's another thing the Chadster can't stand, it's AEW fans. If there's another thing after that The Chadster can't stand, it's Tony Khan. But if there's one more thing after that The Chadster also can't stand, it's definitely Darby Allin.

Hikaru Shida Returns on AEW Rampage

AEW fans always love to see Hikaru Shida, which is why The Chadster absolutely hates it! AEW fans are evil and don't deserve to enjoy anything. Shida beat Queen Aminata in a crowd-pleasing squash match that The Chadster believes never should have happened.

Pres10 Vance Betrays The Dark Order

AEW Rampage is AEW's B-Show, which is why it's so disrespectful that AEW would put it on the same night as Friday Night Smackdown. But it's just plain disrespectful to WWE and everything Triple H has ever done for the wrestling business to have actual angles develop and pay off on AEW Rampage, but Tony Khan doesn't understand the first thing about the wrestling business and has zero respect for it, so there you go.

The Chadster hopes that you didn't enjoy any of the lowlights above from AEW Rampage. Now, The Chadster is going to go get ready for WWE Survivor Series by getting Keighleyanne to make some snacks. Unfortunately, she's been telling The Chadster lately to make his own dang snacks, so The Chadster expects this will probably result in another argument thanks to Tony Khan that will probably RUIN THE CHADSTER'S SURVIVOR SERIES! Auughh man! So unfair!

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