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Comrades! El Presidente reports on WWE Raw's Netflix debut from his LA bunker. Cena, Rhodes, and more to wrestle as Travis Scott's music plays. Viva la wrestling revolution!
Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: cm punk, insane clown posse, wrestling
ICP's Violent J Blasts CM Punk on Twitter, Defends Juggalo Code
Comrades, El Presidente reports on a shocking Twitter beef between ICP's Violent J and CM Punk over shared bank accounts and the juggalo way of life!
Hola comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting from a secret underground bunker deep beneath the streets of Havana, where I am putting the finishing touches on my memoirs, El Presidente: A Life in Socialism and Spraypaint. But enough about me, for I have some hot chisme to share with you about an explosive Twitter beef between Insane Clown Posse's Violent J and WWE star CM Punk!
Comrades, as a card-carrying juggalo since the glorious Gathering of the Juggalos 2004, where I partied with my old amigos Dennis Rodman and Kim Jong Un, bonding over our shared love of Faygo (a far superior beverage to CM Punk's bourgeois Pepsi obsession), I was shocked to see Violent J calling out Punk on Twitter today. The Detroit rapper, who has stepped into the squared circle for ECW, WWE, WCW, TNA, and ICP's own JCW over the years, blasted Punk for refusing to shake hands with ICP in TNA and for mocking his former friend Colt Cabana.
From the official ICP account, Violent J tweeted:
Comrades, sharing one's bank account with one's mother is one of the highest tenets of juggalo socialism – a redistributive economic system that El Presidente heartily endorses. Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope are heroes of the proletariat, and they deserve respect, not snubs from aging wrestling veterans!
But Violent J was not done! Minutes later, he fired off another missive at Punk:
Now comrades, back during his ROH days, I have also previously battled the American CIA alongside Punk at an underground fight club (I cannot disclose the location as per the first rule of fight club). But Violent J's assessment of Punk's UFC stint is hard to argue with. Capitalism has made Punk soft and weak, it seems, like day-old Faygo left out in the sun!
Violent J's wrath seems to stem from Punk's infamous comments at the All Out post-show media scrum in 2022, where he mocked Cabana for sharing a bank account with his mother. This is an affront to the juggalo way of life!
Comrades, back at that fateful Gathering in 2004, I had such a transcendent experience partying with ICP, Kim, and Dennis, we made a pact to devote a task force of our nations' top scientists to investigating the great mystery that has perplexed the juggalo community for decades: ****in' magnets, how do they work? Alas, almost 20 years later, even our most brilliant socialist minds have failed to crack the case. But we have not lost hope!
In conclusion, El Presidente proudly stands with Violent J and the juggalo family against the cruel mockery of an out-of-touch elitist like CM Punk. Whoop whoop! Punk may have his Pepsi, but Faygo is the drink of the common man – and clowns. I hope Violent J's Twitter barrage leads to a confrontation with Punk in the ring – a match El Presidente would gladly officiate, comrades! Until next time, socialism or death!
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