Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: dustin rhodes, wrestling

Schrödinger's Dustin Rhodes Both Respected and Not Respected in WWE

Comrades! Your El Presidente reports on Dustin Rhodes' quantum wrestling paradox! Was he respected in WWE? Yes and no! The CIA is very confused by this development!

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my gold-plated underground bunker where I am currently hiding from the American CIA agents who have been trying to infiltrate my compound disguised as wrestling merchandise vendors! Today, I bring you the fascinating quantum physics phenomenon occurring in the world of professional wrestling!

In the great battlefield of wrestling politics, we have witnessed a most intriguing development involving the veteran performer Dustin Rhodes, brother of former WWE champion Cody Rhodes. Much like my own complicated relationship with the United Nations Security Council, Dustin appears to be experiencing what scientists and dictator-bloggers like myself call "Schrödinger's Respect" – a paradoxical state where he is both respected and not respected simultaneously!

This weekend, when a wrestling fan suggested that Dustin should finish his illustrious career in WWE alongside his brother Cody, Dustin responded with surprising clarity:

This statement, comrades, created quite the uproar! WWE loyalists rushed to defend the company's treatment of Dustin during his many years as the flamboyant Goldust character. The tribal wars erupted faster than the time Fidel Castro and I attempted to start a socialist wrestling promotion in Havana! (The American CIA sabotaged us by replacing our ring ropes with licorice. Very embarrassing, but delicious, situation for all involved.)

But just when the wrestling universe thought they understood Dustin's position, the quantum fluctuation occurred! Dustin clarified his stance with another tweet:

Comrades, this is the wrestling equivalent of the famous Schrödinger's cat experiment! You see, in 1935, physicist Erwin Schrödinger proposed a thought experiment where a cat in a box could be considered both alive and dead until the box was opened. Similarly, Dustin Rhodes exists in a superposition of states where he both respects his WWE tenure and yet claims AEW is the "only place" he felt respected!

This reminds me of the time I hosted Kim Jong-un for a WrestleMania viewing party. He insisted that North Korean scientists had already solved this quantum paradox, but then couldn't explain how when I asked him. He just kept demanding more nachos and threatening nuclear annihilation. Classic Kim!

The truth, my wrestling compadres, is quite simple when you apply socialist dialectical thinking. Dustin can simultaneously appreciate his WWE career while feeling that AEW provides a more respectful environment. Just as I can appreciate American fast food chains while denouncing American imperialism! It is not contradictory – it is the complex reality of human experience.

Dustin's tweets reveal the fascinating duality of his wrestling existence. He spent 24 years in WWE as Goldust, a character that brought him fame and fortune, yet he feels most fulfilled as "Dustin Rhodes" in AEW. The respect he refers to may be about creative freedom, character development, or simply workplace atmosphere. Like the mysterious contents of Schrödinger's box, we cannot fully know another person's lived experience.

And before the wrestling tribalists on either side could fully process this quantum wrestling conundrum, Dustin made his final position clear with this tweet:

And there you have it, comrades! Dustin Rhodes has collapsed his own wave function and emerged from the box very much alive and unbothered by internet opinions. This is a philosophy I strongly endorse! When the CIA attempts to destabilize my regime with negative social media campaigns, I too simply log off and focus on more important matters, like expanding my collection of vintage wrestling figurines and plotting the global socialist revolution!

Until next time, this has been your El Presidente, reminding you that in wrestling, as in geopolitics, reality is often more complex than it first appears! ¡Viva la revolución del wrestling!

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