Posted in: Movies, Universal | Tagged: bleeding cool, fast and furious, Furious 7

Furious 7 Cements the Fast Franchise as Fantastic

It's been a minute, but now that summer is looming closer (and with that the release of F9 – finally), it's time to round out our "not-so-fast Fast and Furious" re-watch series with the penultimate film: Furious 7. We're suspending our disbelief and putting our "heist logic" to use as we jump back into the latest chapter in the saga of the bald and the beautiful (spoiler: Vin Diesel is both). Speaking of spoilers….there are many, many franchise spoilers within. You have been warned.

This is the revenge story of the Shaw brothers, Owen and Deckard (Jason Statham) – remember the hot British baddie from the last film? Well, his brother is even worse, and he vows to get vengeance on the people who left his brother all exploded and in a coma. Meanwhile, Brian (Paul Walker) is living the minivan life while Letty (Michelle Rodriguez) is easing back into her high-speed race life with Dom, despite her amnesia…and not adjusting well. Actually, neither of them are adjusting particularly well to their new lives; Letty leaves to figure out her own life, and after things get a little explodey at home, Brian once again packs up and relocates his family to a tropical safehouse, sensing that sh*t is about to go down.

With the women and children safely tucked away, that frees up the crew to get revenge on Shaw for Han's murder – hello, Tokyo Drift cameos – with, of course, a little help from Mr. "I'm bored now that I don't have a globe-trotting case and am stuck in the hospital with my daughter and a broken arm until I hulk my cast off" The Rock, aka Agent Hobbs. We'll just put aside the fact that Han's murder is on him – if he had stopped Shaw from hacking into his computer instead of having a nice slow creepy conversation with him in his dimly lit office prior to getting his ass kicked, he'd likely still be alive. Seriously, why does everyone keep letting this creep talk and stall for time instead of just taking the opportunity and just shooting him? You intend to do it, so just do it – don't give him time to kill you first!

Side note: since when does the military issue very tactical and fashionable-looking shawl collar hoodies? I'm not sure those are exactly standard uniforms, but I suppose nothing about Mr. Nobody (Kurt Russell) and his crew is a standard issue. Really no character in this film does things the "standard issue" way, at least not the prince with "rowdy" Rhonda Rousey as a bodyguard. Not to mention a fight sequence between her and Letty with both of them dressed to the nines – it is the absolute perfection of a formal fight in a penthouse.

You know how in every good slasher movie, there's at least one incredibly creative kill that everyone talks about? Fast and the Furious is similar in that regard – so many iconic stunts in the franchise, but Dom and Hobbs' legendary helicopter takedown is perhaps my favorite scene in possibly the entire franchise so far. It's so unrealistic and absurd; I have no choice but to be 100% here for it.

Skydiving cars? Check. Helicopter shenanigans? Double-check. It's hyper-violent and uber-ridiculous, but Furious 7 is full of heartwarming family, fast cars, and of course, insane car stunts. The amount of things that happen in this franchise through sheer force of will is astounding; between Letty's "live because I remember now" monologue, jumping cars through not one, not two, but three skyscrapers and landing unscathed, and using a collapsed parking garage roof as a ramp to jump a car into a helicopter and hang a bag of hand grenades from the landing skid is heist movie logic at its finest. Just go with it and have some more popcorn – it doesn't need to make sense beyond being both fast and furious.

Yes, sadly, this was Paul Walker's final film, but not only did the franchise manage to give him a cinematic send-off by dedicating the film to him with a nice look back at his role in the franchise through the years, but they also accomplished the difficult feat of giving his character, Brian, a proper ending – the happy ending the actor didn't get in real life. It's a beautiful, touching tribute that will always make me cry and gave audiences and fans some amount of closure.

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