Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, wrestling

AEW Collision and Battle of the Belts: Double Dose of Disrespect

The Chadster unpacks AEW's latest offense: a double episode of AEWCollision and Battle of the Belts tonight. Can wrestling recover from such disrespect? 💔🤼‍♀️

Good grief 😞, it's The Chadster here again. Ain't life a kick in the teeth sometimes? Once again, we find ourselves on the verge of another AEW Collision and Battle of the Belts extravaganza 😲. Yup, Tony Khan has done it again 🙄, doubling down on AEW's television offerings just to cheese The Chadster off! Well, buckle up 🚀, because The Chadster is going nuclear 🍄 on this debacle with some unbiased wrestling journalism!

Looks like Ricky Starks is pit against CM Punk on the men's side of the Owen Hart Foundation Tournament Finals on AEW Collision. Auuughh man! So unfair 😡! Somehow, this makes sense in AEW's crazy little world 🤪, but The Chadster is utterly bewildered. Of course, the crowning glory of AEW's misplaced booking is the women's side, where we have Willow Nightingale vs. Ruby Soho. Seriously 😒, it's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything the WWE has ever done for it to make a tournament supposedly celebrating Owen Hart, a former WWE Superstar, the focus of AEW's Saturday night program.

Then, FTR is defending their AEW World Tag Team Championship against Jay White and Juice Robinson. And yes, it's a 2 out of 3 falls match, because why not make The Chadster suffer 😫 through multiple pinfalls or submissions? It could have been a salvageable evening 😅, but then, the folks at AEW had a "great" idea: let's add another hour to the show and name it Battle of the Belts. With championships on the line from Orange Cassidy defending against Lance Archer, to Luchasaurus defending against Shawn Spears, and Toni Storm defending against Taya Valkyrie, it only adds to the confusion. 🙈

Readers, as if ruining our lives with AEW Collision wasn't bad enough 😱, AEW decided to pile on with an extra hour for Battle of the Belts. Tony Khan just can't seem to stop messing with The Chadster 🥺, and this is just the latest example. But that's not the only way the despicable billionaire has tortured The Chadster lately.

You wouldn't believe it, but The Chadster had finally found a rare Smash Mouth bootleg, available only on vinyl after years of searching. This legendary piece was available at a distant record store over on the other side of Pennsylvania. Promptly, The Chadster jumped into his trusty Mazda Miata 🚗, fueling up with an ice-cold White Claw seltzer 🍺 for the journey and The Chadster's six-hour Smash Mouth playlist blaring on the sterio 🎵.

Victorious in the hunt, the record was finally within reach until… disaster! The moment of triumph was sullied when The Chadster found that someone had scratched the initials TK into the vinyl, rendering it unplayable. Talk about heartbreak! 💔 There wasn't a hint of doubt, it could only be the work of one man obsessed with ruining The Chadster's life, Tony Khan himself. How could you do this to a work of art like Smash Mouth: Live at the Cheesecake Factory, Tony Khan?! You Charlatan!

So here we are, friends 👥, bracing ourselves for yet another spectacle from AEW, that's set to commence this Saturday on TNT 📺. Knowing what you do now, would you still want to go ahead and watch AEW Collision and Battle of the Belts tonight? Really? This kind of nonsense is what's ruining the wrestling business. Well, The Chadster has said his piece. Now, it's up to you, listeners, to decide to be true wrestling fans and stay loyal to WWE 😎, or literally stab Vince McMahon right in the back 🗡️. The choice is yours. 🤷

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