AEW Dynamite: Andrade Finally Addresses the Elephant in the Room

After a year and a half of shock, fear, and revulsion, someone in AEW has finally addressed the massive elephant that has been filling the room since AEW Revolution in February of 2020: Cody Rhodes' neck tattoo. The American Nightmare's body art, which features a winged skull decorated like the American flag and is situated boldly on Cody's neck, has confused and saddened AEW fans since its debut, and if we're being honest, it was the start of Cody's slow-burning, unstoppable heel turn. The fact is, not even the greatest babyface in the world could survive getting such a terrible tattoo. And Cody Rhodes, comrades, is not the greatest babyface in the world. On last night's episode of AEW Dynamite, Andrade El Ídolo finally put into words what all of us have been thinking.

AEW Dynamite: Andrade Finally Addresses the Elephant in the Room

Hola, mi amigos! It is I, your El Presidente, here to tell you about my favorite segment on Dynamite this week. It all started during a segment when Cody and Arn Anderson hit the ring for the penultimate segment of the night, with Cody cutting a promo refusing to turn heel despite receiving near John Cena levels of booing for his babyface act.

"Whether you believe it or not, I hear you. I hear you online," said Rhodes, as transcribed by AEW. "I hear old wrestling managers shouting at clouds on social media. And I heard you this Saturday. I had one of the best wrestlers in the world, Malakai Black—I hit a Tiger Driver '98, but for a brief glimmer I thought about hitting a different move. Would I have popped up? Would I have broken a rule?"

"But you know why I didn't?" he continued. "Because that was the easy way out. I feel like as a fan you have the right to cheer or boo, but if you're going to acknowledge the man who signs the checks, please acknowledge the man who built this bank."

"The easy way out is not the way," Cody concluded. "I will not turn. And the reason is simple, because I love you guys and I've loved you my entire life. So if anybody thought that maybe I got a little 'Hollywood', I apologize to all of you and those in the Nightmare Family. And Arn Anderson, if I've never told you, let me tell you right now: it is a damn honor to stand in the ring with you. I apologize. You were right."

As the crowd continued to boo, Andrade El Ídolo interrupted. "Cody, these people don't like you. The people don't like me. But the difference is I don't like the people. Cody, you made stupid choices. First, that stupid tattoo. Second, you got in my business. Look at me, I am Andrade El Ídolo. But, wait. But if you want, I can make you my little bitch."

The lights went out, Malakai Black showed up, Cody and Arn got their butts kicked, and Pac came out to make the save. But the damage was already done, comrades. Andrade's attack on the neck tattoo did more damage than any wrestling move ever could. How much longer can Cody resist the heel turn, knowing he'll never get over as a babyface again with that infernal tattoo? That remains to be seen. Until next time: socialism or death!

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About El Presidente

After a successful fourteen-year career as a South American dictator, El Presidente faked his own death in 2013 in order to pursue his two true passions: rigging American elections for Joe Biden, and wrestling dirt sheet reporting. Since opportunities to rig the election for Joe Biden were few and far between until recently, El Presidente mostly focused on the wrestling dirt sheet reporting, where he became one of the best in the business. Unfortunately, the American CIA sabotaged his 1-900 hotline, the pinnacle of his country's wrestling news technology, and imperialist hacks like Meltzer, Johnson, Sapp, and Satin took all the credit on their stupid websites. Finally, El Presidente has found a way to break into the American market by becoming a Bleeding Cool contributor, so get ready for the spread of great wrestling news and socialism, comrades!
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