Impact Wrestling – The Rascals Get a Tag Team Title Shot

It's NXT Super Tuesday, but you know who Tuesday belonged to first? That's right, Impact Wrestling! And personally, I think it's pretty rude of NXT to move to Tuesday for two weeks and then have everyone be like, "oh, NXT is running unopposed on Tuesday." Well, what about Impact?! What about Impact?!

The official logo of Impact Wrestling.
The official logo of Impact Wrestling.

Impact Wrestling Report for September 8th, 2020 Part 2 of 3

We left off in part one with the exciting promise of a Brian Myers promo as Impact took a commercial break. If you're watching on Twitch, as I am, you get a Melissa Santos live stream instead of commercials. On this break, Melissa commiserates with the commenters on wishing Wrestle House wasn't over. She points out she can't answer questions about other promotions but considers launching her own Twitch account so she can. She says she probably wouldn't get in the ring and wrestle in the future–except to beat her husband's ass in an intergender match.

Time for the Brian Myers promo! No! You have to wait for that, marks! It's the Eric Young Bound for Glory commercial. Then John E Bravo is backstage trying to acquire the ridiculous things Taya Valkyrie wants him to have for his wedding to Rosemary. Kiera Hogan and Tasha Steelz show up and bug him about an invitation. He says they need to ask Taya. They try to talk him into standing up to Taya. They offer to teach him how to be a man and try to get him to make them his best groomsmen. He says Taya would never go for that. Kiera tells him that to be a good husband; he has to learn to be a man.

Finally! The moment we've all been waiting for. Brian Myers comes to the ring! Josh Matthews questions Myers' "most professional wrestler" nickname. Blasphemy!

Impact Promo – Brian Myers

Myers says he and Willie Mack may have gotten off on the wrong foot. He explains who he is, the most professional wrestler. He talks up his WWE career, which, let's be honest here, is not a lot to talk up. Anyway, he says there's no shame in losing to him. But there's a time-honored tradition of the handshake, to give respect to the people that paved the way for you. He invites Willie Mack to come out and shake his hand.

Willie Mack comes out. Mack didn't come out to be professional or shake hands. He'd rather put his hands around Myers' neck and shake that. He says that Impact granted Mack a rematch against Myers, and it's happening right now. Myers says he's not ready and is in his street clothes. Willie tells him a professional should always bring his gear.

Brian Myers vs. Willie Mack

  • Myers pretends like he's leaving and then tries to sneak attack Mack, but it doesn't work.
  • Willie kicks his ass in the ring, up the ramp, then back down to the ring.
  • Myers eventually manages to pull Mack out of the ring and get the upper hand.
  • Meyers is better in the ring than he is on the mic.
  • Meyers gets offense until he blows a splash in the corner, and Willie takes over to bring us toward the finish.
  • Mack hits his big moves and tries to pin Myers. Myers rakes him in the eyes, but Mack powerbombs him.
  • But when Myers takes off his shirt and tosses it in the ring, the ref is distracted, and Myers hits a low blow and gets the win.

Josh Matthews is absolutely outraged. Gia Miller talks to Jordynne Grace about showing up at Deonna Purrazzo's celebration last week and not getting violent. Jordynne says she's not about that life, but she does want to know what Tenille Dashwood's problem is. They go marching off to find Tenille, who has her own dressing room. She knocks, and Kaleb (with a K), who is Tenille's personal photographer, answers the door. He won't let Jordynne in.

We see a video package showing off his shoot with Tenille, which says she'll be coming out next week. Grace asks: "are you serious?" and walks away. Impact takes a commercial break.

Taya Valkyrie accosts Kiera Hogan and Tasha Steelz backstage for trying to talk to John E. Bravo earlier and become his best groomsmen. Taya tells them to mind their business and stay out of the wedding. It leads to a match between Taya and Tasha for later tonight. But first, The Rascalz come out to the ring. Then the Motor City Machine Guns do.

The Rascalz vs. Motor City Machine Guns – Impact Tag Team Championship Match

  • The story here is that the Motor City Machine Guns were so impressed with the Rascalz, even in defeat, at Slammiversary that they wanted to put the belts on the line against them with the Rascalz prepared to face them.
  • So this is one of those "both teams respect each other" type of matches.
  • But the Machine Guns work the knees of Wentz hard. I mean, it's still a wrestling match. He sells his left leg being hurt.
  • This culminates in a spot where Shelly puts various submissiosn on Wentz while Sabin puts submissions on Dez, preventing him from breaking it up and making him watch. But Dez does eventually take out Sabin and break it up, and after that, he gets the hot tag.
  • Dez gets a bunch of offense on Sabin, but then the MAchine Guns take them both out with a series of tandem moves and win the match.

The North attacks the Machine Guns after the match. The Machine Guns get the upper hand. But Madman Fulton and Ace Austin run out and attack the Machine Guns now. Austin and Fulton and The North face-off, but decide not to fight, instead each taking one Machine Gun and beating him down. This drags out just long enough to build some tension, and then the Good Brothers run out and clear the ring of heels. Dez hits a flip over the top rope onto the heels, but they catch him. So Wentz hits a dive from the top turnbuckle. The faces celebrate in the ring.

Katie Forbes and Rob Van Dam talk about beating the crap out of Sami Callahan. But that's not it – they also got picked up for a series. Really? Oh, it's an Impact segment, The Whole F'N Talk Show, debuting next week. Impact takes a commercial break. What else does Impact have in store tonight? Find out in the third and final part of our Impact report.

About Jude Terror

A prophecy once said that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero would come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events. Sadly, that prophecy was wrong. Oh, Jude Terror was right. For ten years. About everything. But nobody listened. And so, Jude Terror has moved on to a more important mission: turning Bleeding Cool into a pro wrestling dirt sheet!