Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: Raw, wrestling, wwe

6/9/2020 WWE Raw Recap, Analysis, and Video Highlights – Part 2

Welcome to part two of Jude Terror watching WWE Raw, so you don't have to. You're welcome. If you haven't already, go and read part one here. And if you have read it already, well, the time sunk fallacy says you have no choice but to continue. Let's find out what else happened on Monday Night Raw!

Tom Phillips recaps everything we literally just watched in the previous segment. Then he promotes the MVP Lounge later tonight with a recap of last week's events. Backstage, Charly Caruso is with MVP. MVP promotes his segment later tonight, but he's interrupted by R-Truth and his 24/7 title. Truth wants MVP not to tell Rob Gronkowski he's here. Bobby Lashley shows up and puts him in the full nelson, and we go to commercials.

Back from commercials, we see a recap of what happened just before the commercials. Then a recap of what happened before what happened before the commercials, which was a recap of last week. In addition to the MVP Lounge tonight, the Viking Raiders will fight Lashley and MVP in a tag team match. Now we get a recap of the last several weeks of Street Profits/Viking Raiders segments from previous episodes of Raw.

This week, the teams compete in a decathlon. The first event is a 1600-meter dash. The fatter Viking Raider (Ivar, I think?) loses to Montez Ford. The next event is Archery, and the Raiders win that one. Next, they play "flip cup," which appears to be a drinking game, but the cups are clearly filled with water. The Street profits win. What happened to these segments? They used to be kind of funny. You know what, screw this.  They do Swordfighting next. Then hurdles. Then stick fighting. Then a dance-off. Ivar is not a bad dancer, actually. Then shotput. Then turkey leg eating. Then pole vault. The decathlon ends in a tie, and that was ten minutes of my life I'll never get back.

Apollo Crews comes out just in time for a recap of his match on Raw last week. Crews says he's really happy WWE waited until the pandemic era so that WWE could force the crowd to care about him. He's going to defend the title in an open challenge… against the winner of a Triple Threat between Andrade, Angel Garza, and Kevin Owens. That's not how open challenges work, Apollo. Kevin Owens shows up to attack Andrade and Garza early, which is the perfect segue into some commercials.

I use this opportunity for a bathroom break, and when I come back, Andrade and Garza are double-teaming Owens. But predictably, when Andrade tries to cover Owens, Garza breaks it up, and they start fighting each other. Time for more commercials.

Back from break, Garza and Owens are going at it on the ropes in the corner. Owens blocks a superplex and hits a senton bomb, but Andrade breaks that up. Tom Phillips has gone too long without a recap of what happened moments ago, so he shows a clip of what happened before the commercials. In the ring, everyone is lying around and selling. Now, and I swear I'm not making this up, Phillips shows us a recap of what happened while we were watching the previous recap. @#$% you, Phillips.

Everyone trades some superkicks, and Owens hits a frog splash on Andrade for a two-count. We see Apollo Crews watching from backstage. Inside, Owens misses a popup powerbomb, and Garza gets a two-count off an elbow strike. Garza hits a dropkick on Owens, and now it's Owens' turn to sell outside the ring while these two face off. They spill to the outside just in time for Owens to come back and hit a dive.

Owens brings Garza in the ring and tries the stunner, but Garza dodges and puts a leg submission on Owens, who makes his way to the ropes. Owens hits a stunner, but Andrade breaks it up and steals the pin on Garza. He'll face Crews at Backlash and hopefully win the title because come on, Crews literally stuck to his Raw US Championship open challenge deal for one week!

Tom Phillips takes us back to what happened earlier on between the Iconics, Sasha and Bayley, and Charlotte and Asuka. Backstage, a Renee Young clone talks to Charlotte Flair. Flair paints her Takeover loss as a victory somehow. She elevated NXT, and now she's back on Raw. Asuka interrupts to dance around with her title. When Flair asks her if she takes anything seriously, Asuka slaps her. Commercials.

Backstage, Selina Vega is very angry with Andrade and Garza. Tom Phillips promotes The Greatest Wrestling Match Ever. Kurt Angle is the legend to sully his reputation this week by buying into this gimmick. Angle, who is painfully obviously reading from cue cards (hey, if it's good enough for Gronk…), says he's glad he's not under the pressure of the Greatest Wrestling Match Ever. He chooses Edge to win the match. Sweet lord, he even read his "it's true, it's damn true" catchphrase from the cue cards.

Backstage, the Viking Raiders want Drew McIntyre to join their team. McIntyre wants to invite them to a party later. There will be turkey legs there. But the Raiders have to beat MVP and Bobby Lashley. The VIP lounge is next. McIntyre teases showing up at the lounge "because you never know what can happen on Monday Night Raw." That may have been true twenty years ago, Drew. It isn't now. Commercials.

Back from commercials, MVP is in the ring. You know, if I went to a VIP lounge and it was just two fake leather couches in the middle of a wrestling ring, I'd want my money back. MVP works the crowd by saying he's better than everyone. These trainees haven't eaten in three days, MVP. Cut them some slack. He calls out Lashley, calling his full nelson the most devastating move in WWE. But Drew McIntyre comes out instead.

MVP wants to know why McIntyre is here. McIntyre has been watching the show, and he wants to make sure there's no drama with Lashley and Lana. MVP puts over Lashley's full nelson again. McIntyre puts over the full nelson too, but he points out that MVP has taken a lot of claymores lately. MVP says Lashley will put the full nelson on McIntyre at Backlash.

McIntyre asks MVP if he's Lashley's "Yoda." He gives MVP to the count of three before he hits him with a Claymore. Bobby Lashley shows up. McIntyre makes a timely reference to Charlton Heston and says Lashley will need to pry the WWE Championship from his cold dead hands. The Viking Raiders come out, and we go to commercials.

We'll wrap this up one more part, so if you hate yourself as much as I do, check back soon for part three of our recap of Monday Night Raw.

Enjoyed this? Please share on social media!

Stay up-to-date and support the site by following Bleeding Cool on Google News today!