Thirty-Three Thoughts About Thirty-Three Comics – Young Avengers, Tom Strong, Nova, Secret Avengers, Now What?, Haunted Horror, Justice League Dark, Great Pacific, Satellite Sam, Sex Criminals, Uncanny Avengers, Pretty Deadly, Judge Dredd, Velvet, Infinity Hunt, Conan, Infinity Heist, Larfleez, Savage Wolverine, Rat Queens, Massive, Doctor Who, Rocketeer/Spirit, Samurai Jack, Mind MGMT, Kiss Me Satan, Zombie War, Fever Ridge, Dark Horse Presents, Vampirella, Army Of Darkness/Reanimator and Thunderbolts

Another week, a lovely load of comic books!

IMG_0026 The Gay Blade does seem to suit the long beard and hair in when talking to a created-by-Alan-Moore character in today's Tom Strong, doesn't he?

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Today's lesson. When fighting Nova, don't call his mother a cow. Simples.

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Don't worry new Inhuman-in-Secret-Avengers, there are worst places you could have looked.

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Marvel's Now What? pulls few punches when tackling the the current Marvel trend to relaunch titles, have people sitting around tables talking, and coming up with random names associated with random adjectives. In one issue, Marvel has out-guttered The Gutters.

Haunted Horror #7

And with Haunted Horror, a blast from the past, sets the stage for male and female relationships for comic books this week. How? It just did!

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But what's really of note this week is… the sex. Sex sex sex. We already know that Wolverine has sworn off carnal desires today. Well, John Constantine hasn't in Justice League Dark. And Nightmare Nurse has clearly had her wicked way with the smoky man.

gpacific The Great Pacific goes for more erotic suggestion, naked feet and a dropped robe saying so much… it's quite distracting, don't you think, Satellite Sam?

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Satellite Sam? Satellite Sam?

sexcMatt Fraction points out that ComiXology still has his second issue of Sex Criminals "under review", but Image publish far stronger problems without digital issues these days. Though few have suspended-in-time-and-space semen… IMG_0004

Although one of the more sexually explicit comics this week came from Marvel with Uncanny Avengers, and Wanda and Simon making their own magic. What happens next? Well, hopefully something like Pretty Deadly.

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Another example of the institutionalised misandry on the comics industry there. Notice that the victims in Pretty Deadly are men, naked, prone and bleeding, with the use of the word "whore" a diversion tactic from an all female team trying to appeal to male sensibilities for a panel or two. But that's all. Clearly what the industry needs are more men working in comics to give a more balanced view. 95% just isn't enough, it seems.

Judge Dredd #12

Even Judge Dredd gets in on the action. Quick, quick, can't we find any man to stand up to a woman?

velvet

Phew, that's better. Misogyny maintained.

Velvet is probably my favourite comic this week, it just drips of the kind of comic you don't see these days, the Modesty Blaise, Button Man, a time when comic artists – or indeed comic strip artists – were stylised draughtsmen with an ability to take the everyday and portray them with extreme detail but also living, moving on the page, screeching out of the panel. Combined with the concept of making Moneypenny stepping up to take on James Bond's legacy, is astounding. A wonderful high concept, but one executed with such skill. Steve Epting has just never looked quite so good.

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Yes, this is the day when every man in comics takes their top off. Well, I did see Thor The Dark Age, clearly there's something in the air, isn't there, Infinity Hunt?

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Of course, for some, it's all they've ever known…

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But, as Infinity Heist points out, it's good to break out of a rut. Leave your job and set up on your own, become a job creator, a wealth creator… or possibly a wealth stealer. Hey, stealing from bank vaults or from an industry's marketshare, it's all the same, right kids?

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Young Avengers give us their own version of the fuck tree… more about spheres of influences here though. I think. And we've all seen the big spoiler from last night, right?

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Larfleez is a real joy, especially when it goes on diversions like this. I can't help be reminded of the work of Matt Howarth – and then wonder what Matt Howarth is up to right now. I mean, seriously, has anyone heard of Matt Howarth lately? Aliens who look nothing like us, but behave in a very mundane human fashion.

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While Savage Wolverine does the opposite. Hey, wait a minute, didn't we do this story in Captain America a few months ago?

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Rat Queens have another orifice to obsess over. Just hope they don't encounter the next fellow.

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Ouch. That is, as the title of the book might suggest, Massive.

Doctor Who #14

Doctor Who turns off the television. Seriously, if he tries this trick on November the 23rd I'm not going to be happy. And, as we learned earlier, neither will Bunker.

Rocketeer_Spirit #2

Don't you hate it when car passengers fight while you're actually trying to drive them somewhere? And it's not as if you can see properly with a domino mask on, and frankly you just have to concentrate properly. In Rocketeer/Spirit #2, The Spirit has just that face…

Samurai Jack #1

Samurai Jack #1 shows that even at this size, you can still squash a bug if they shout in your face long enough. Reassuring to know.

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Mind MGMT makes a blatant land grab for the attention of comic book readers. And not just by being a comic book.

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Say, Kiss Me Satan… If you shake corpses, don't they just…. you know… fall apart?

Zombie War #1

Don't worry, those living in a Zombie War, just give them a bit of a shake.

Fever Ridge #4

Fever Ridge gives us a nice bit of religious pomposity and pretense to hide hideous amounts of violence

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And in Dark Horse Presents, we get a similarly religious hate crime from David Lapham. Or just a really entertainingly designed knuckle duster used for breaking into restaurants possibly owned by Hindi?

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Yeah, I think your problem is that you're just too powerful a woman, Vampirella, and you know, that can cause performance issues for certain pieces of equipment. Just give it some time alone in a quiet room, and it'll be fine. Just… no pressure, okay?

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Elektra has better success with hers in Thunderbolts.. But that's because she's Elektra.

Layout 1Well, if Sabrina The Teenage Witch can get a copy of The Necronomicon, I suppose Elvis Presley might as well get one too in Age Of Darkness/Reanimator.

So… what have you been reading today?

Comics courtesy of Orbital Comics, London. Who tonight are hosting a conversation between Trina Robbins and Hannah Berry at 7.30pm. Who tomorrow are launching a Mark Buckingham exhibition tomorrow with a signing at 4pm. And who on Friday will be screening the film Better Things: The Life And Choices Of Jeffrey Catherine Jones at 7pm.

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About Rich Johnston

Founder of Bleeding Cool. The longest-serving digital news reporter in the world, since 1992. Author of The Flying Friar, Holed Up, The Avengefuls, Doctor Who: Room With A Deja Vu, The Many Murders Of Miss Cranbourne, Chase Variant. Lives in South-West London, works from Blacks on Dean Street, shops at Piranha Comics. Father of two. Political cartoonist.