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The Kyurem Scale: Rating Bosses In Pokémon GO – Forces Of Nature

Bleeding Cool is here to introduce the Kyurem Scale in Pokémon GO. This new system, based on both the odd-placement and bastardly penchant for hopping out of balls exhibited by the Unova Legendary Pokémon Kyurem, is meant to rate the difficulty of catching Legendary Pokémon in Pokémon GO raids on a scale of "One" through "Full @#$%ing Kyurem." Now that we have assessed multiple generations of Legendaries, we move to the Legendary trio known as the Forces of Nature.

Thundurus in Pokémon GO. Credit: Niantic
Thundurus in Pokémon GO. Credit: Niantic

Tornadus, Thundurus, and Landorus

Normally, all Pokémon get their own entry on the Kyurem Scale, but come on. Let's keep it a buck here. These three? It's the same guy. If your friend Larry shows up one day with blue face paint on instead of green, that's still damn Larry, okay? These Planet Fitness genies may have thought they tricked us with this blatant reskin, but these are the same Pokémon three different times with slightly more suggestive tails.

As far as catching them, these Pokémon are also way harder to catch than they are desirable. When you've got what has to be, bar none, the least popular Legendary trio, you'd think that they'd be a bit less of a a$$#@%# when it came to staying in balls and staying still… but alas. These three are about as annoying about getting caught as they are in design.

That said, their Therian Formes, which are unreleased in Pokémon GO, are awesome and look like actual Pokémon instead of a guy fresh off of a workout looking to pick a fight in a 7-Eleven. When those come out, these may actually be worth the strife it takes to get them to stay in a Premier Ball, but until then…

Ratings:

TORNADUS: 7 out of 10, with just one point taken off because of how prime for the jokes its name is

THUNDURUS: 8 out of 10, why does your tail look so sus?

LANDORUS: 8 out of 10, tough beefy boi.


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Theo DwyerAbout Theo Dwyer

Theo Dwyer writes about comics, film, and games.
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