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WWE Raw Report: The Riott Squad Starts Break-Up After Long Epic Run

WWE Monday Night Raw is off to a… well, to its usual sort of start. Nothing too impressive. But I promise they nail the ending. But before that, you have to get through hour two…

Hurt Business is in the ring for the VIP lounge. MVP is pissed off from all the sabotage last week. He says he told us last week there was a conspiracy taking place, and he was right. MVP says it's impossible for a professional like himself to win championships under these unsafe working conditions. He didn't lose to Apollo Crews last week. He lost to the lights. MVP accuses Apollo of being behind Retribution.

The Iiconics celebrate on WWE Raw.
The Iiconics celebrate on WWE Raw.

Apollo comes out. He says MVP is always making excuses. MVP points out that Crews made excuses to take several weeks off from WWE. MVP is a coronavirus denier? Crews says he's the one walking around with the new United States Championship MVP paid for. MVP says Crews is a serial bad decision-maker. Coming out here was a bad decision since he's outnumbered three-to-one.

Crews says he does make bad decisions sometimes, but he's allowed to because he's a bad man. Crews says he doesn't care about Shelton Benjamin or Bobby Lashley, but he does care about MVP. At SummerSlam, Crews promises the only lights that will be going out will be MVP's.

Lashley and Benjamin slide out of the ring to go after Crews but Crews slides in and attacks MVP. Instead of getting back in to help, Lashley and Benjamin kinda stand there awkwardly while Crews picks up one of the VIP lounge couches in order to fend them off. Raw goes to commercials.

Apollo Crews vs. Shelton Benjamin

Crews is taking on Shelton Benjamin when Raw comes back from break. I thought he didn't care about him? As I mentioned in part one of this report, I'm trying to be less wordy. As such, here are the bullet points:

  • It's a pretty good match.
  • Crews gets his ass kicked for the majority of it.
  • Benjamin hits his entire move-set and then when he's out of moves he works a headlock to kill time.
  • That means it's time for Crews to make a comeback, so he does… but Lashley trips him up on the ropes, allowing Benjamin to roll him up for a win.

Winner: Shelton Benjamin

Lashley puts Crews in the Full Nelson after the match, but MVP stops him. He says he needs Crews healthy so he can take the championship at SummerSlam. Crews thanks MVP by kicking him in the head and running away.

Tom Phillips has breaking news: someone threw a cinder block through a glass window at the performance center. It's all on camera – a lone official finds those hooligans from Retribution shouting outside the entrance with a cinder block. They toss it through a window and run away. Now, you may be asking, "isn't this angle kind of insensitive considering social unrest is still prevalent in the country, including a flareup in Chicago this weekend after another police shooting?" And the answer would be: no, of course not, because as a first sheet reporter who used to work for WWE has reported multiple times, this angle is not political. Raw goes to commercials.

Sarah Shreiber interviews Mickey James, returning to Monday Night Raw. Mickey has a big announcement. She's back to help lead the locker room, but she has gold on her mind. Lana and Natalya show up wearing matching dresses. Lana asks how Mickey can lead the locker room when she doesn't even have a TikTok. Natalya says she's the Serena Williams of the WWE. Mickey is unimpressed. She expects this nonsense from Lana, but Natalya at least has her family's legacy to leech off of. All true.

Tom Phillips plays us a recap video of last week's Raw Underground. There are 147 camera cuts in the replay video alone. Raw Underground will be back for the third hour tonight.

Ivar is hitting on a woman backstage when Erik shows up with Ricochet and Cedric Alexander. She does the "you're cute but you not so much" gag that was only mildly funny the first time, not at all funny the eightieth time. Alexander and Ricochet laugh. Raw goes to commercials.

Phillips plays us a recap of the angle from the start of the show between Seth Rollins and Dominik Mysterio. I pray for Retribution to show up and throw a cinder block at Tom Phillips.

Viking Raiders, Richochet, and Cedric Alexander vs. Akira Tozawa and Ninjas – Raw Nonsense Match

Ricochet and Cedric Alexander come to the ring. They're teaming with the Viking Raiders to take on Akira Tozawa and his ninjas. Here's the bullet points:

  • F**k this s**t

Winners: You know who won

One of the ninjas was actually R-Truth in disguise. He calls out a ref after the match, pins Tozawa, and wins back his 24/7 Championship. He's a 38-time champ now, Tom Phillips reveals.

Charly Caruso interviews Drew McIntyre backstage. McIntyre has had an epiphany. The reason Randy's been keeping his knowledge to himself and taking out all these legends that could help the next generation is self-preservation. He wants to make sure he keeps his grip on the torch and stays on top of WWE. At SummerSlam, Drew is gonna rip the torch from Randy's hand and Randy is gonna realize evolution has just passed him by. Charly wants to know what happens if Kevin Owens beats Orton tonight. McIntyre says he and Owens will have a long talk about the future of Monday Night Raw. Raw goes to commercials.

Liv Morgan vs. Peyton Royce

Ruby Riott and Liv Morgan come to the ring, followed by the Iiconics. They make fun of the Riott Squad on the way to the ring. Liv is two-faced and Ruby's personality changes like the color of her split ends is the gist of it.

  • Royce had a great match with Riott a few weeks ago. Can she do the same with Liv Morgan?
  • No.
  • But it's better than anything on the AEW tag team tournament earlier tonight. Yeah, I said it.
  • Kay tries to interfere. Riott gets on the apron to stop her. The ref is concerned with Riott. Liv is distracted. Royce hits the Deja Vu for the win.

Liv is upset with Ruby after the match, believing she cost her the win. Well, it was a good run of… *checks watch*… one week for the reunited Riott Squad.

Tom Phillips does a recap of the segment between the Golden Role Models and Asuka last week. Asuka gets to fight Bayley this week, and she wins, she gets a shot at Sasha Banks next week.

Shane McMahon approaches the Raw Underground room. He asks the security guard if there's been any trouble. He says no. Raw Underground is next… right after some commercials. And that means we're entering the third and final hour of Raw, so see you part three. Click down below.


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Jude TerrorAbout Jude Terror

A prophecy once said that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero would come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events. Sadly, that prophecy was wrong. Oh, Jude Terror was right. For ten years. About everything. But nobody listened. And so, Jude Terror has moved on to a more important mission: turning Bleeding Cool into a pro wrestling dirt sheet!
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