Another week, another fat stack of comic books. So what are you looking forward to? And what are you not?
And you thought a dragon's fire came from his mouth – Pastaways keeps throwing perspective shifting scenes at the reader, in an eternal double take of a comic book.
From Batman Eternal #51, Stephanie Brown fans get ready to hid Tumblr in anger as she is outed by Bluebird as a complete coward.
Funny, I like her even more now.
Nova gets a look at himself in the
Siege Perilous/Black Vortex. These will be all toys by Christmas, yes? Apart from the Storm one, obviously.
Jem And The Holograms proposes a Marvel/Hasbro crossover in the Wold Newton fashion. Well, Tony Stark has certainly got around, it's quite quite possible.
In Nemo: River Of Ghosts, finally making its way to the USA, we get to meet Desperate Dan's dad, who clearly passed on a love of fine cuisine.
Just hoping that our Wayward girl doesn't read Crossed…
Crossed: Badlands is all about wish fulfilment. Even in the pits of hades, the "what ifs" continue…
Arkham Manor also thinks the direct-to-DVD spinoff just wasn't enough. Amazing artwork, especialy in this issue, very much a horrific Roger Langridge meets Chris Burnham in Shawn Crystal.
Athough, as in Abigail And The Snowman #4, the government are the problem. Maybe they need protecting from children!
It's for people like this, from today's Flash, that Quiet Zones on trains are built for.
A spelling lesson from Gotham Academy as truths are outed and the conspiracy expands… But couldn't it also be a double M? And the location they seek at the Metropolis Museum instead?
Kitty and Peter III from Legendary Star Lord, a long delayed meeting of the holographic distance relationship. And a line that will be reprised by many a cosplayer this season.
"Just kiss me, space boy".
DC"s Gotham By Midnight provides a quick plug for another West Coast publisher…
And Dynamite's Evil Ernie gives a more mixed message from New Jersey about any employees who may be leaving for DC Comics.
While their King: Jim #2 is just plain old insulting.
The Inhuman band seems to be replacing the X-Men in more ways than one.
While God Is Dead looks like it's trying for a crossover as well.
Hit 1957 #1 launches in a pink and purple dazzingly display of love and violence, and it's not alone…
Secret Avengers runs an issue that also really should have come out six weeks ago. People (i.e. me) would have totally made this into a Valentine's Day card as, basically, The Fury gets it on with Cthulhu, in an act of Hentai love. Talking of which…
Zombies Vs. Robots #3 gets a bit of the hentai vibe as well… Underwear Vs. Tentacles.
Quantum & Woody meet the Suicide Sloths. And there you were, thinking you'd be able to outrun them.
Combiner Wars Windblade #1 tries to engender a sense of perspective in the viewer. Appaently we're all in this together, as David Cameron might say.
October Faction #5 brings it on. So handy that people can talk so much when one of them is suspended in the air.
Miami Vice Remix #1 looks like the Vice never ever did before. And, likely, never will again. This is nothing like anything you will expect, unless your expectations have been affected by some seriously strong drugs,
Yes, like those in Archie Comics' Black Hood #2. I reckon that's Betty under the mask.
Edward Scissorhands #5 finds him targeted by Sarah's Law…
D4VE #2 tries the "ladybird, ladybird, fly away home" technique.
Munchkin #3, complete with that oh-so-sought after exclusive card, also has a story. And a few Pratchett-like Deaths.
I HAVE NO NEED OF A RINGTONE.
Of course you don't, sir, of course you don't.
Regular Show: March Madness 2015's shades are so bright, you gotta wear shades – to protect yourself from everyone else's shades.
Curb Stomp #2 does not respect the countdown. How can you work with these people?
There is no pride in the Twilight Zone. Just a lot of very dusty, scuffed kneecaps.
Red Sonja does look as if she should probably at least pass by the emergency room. If nothing else, things will get very messy…
No need for Tarantino's words in Django/Zorro #5. I believe this is known as shock and "aw, yeahh…"
Note that even in Altered States: The Shadow, with our hero reaching an astral plane of realisation, he still has one hell of a honker.
March Of The Crabs gives us all something to be very afraid for. And now I want to see a transistor built by a crab.
Can't I be both? The Wicked + The Divine knows where it stands on the Swamp Thing With Machine Guns issue…
And here's some low fantasy for you from Skullkickers. And the answer is yes…
Think what happens if that's what your codename is. Or if the person who gave you that title was a big Bee Gees fan instead?
It always tastes like chicken. Everything always tastes like chicken. But especially dinosaurs. That turns up in River Of Ghosts too, as well as Chew…
It makes a change when the only creepy thing about a teacher in Morning Glories is that he's a bit of a creep. Instead of a mass murderer/torturer/agent of change…
So that was me… what did you pick up?
Comics courtesy of Orbital Comics, London. Who, this Saturday, are hosting John Allison for the release of his new series Giant Days from Boom! Studios.