Auughh man! It's The Chadster, back again to tell you what to expect from tonight's episode of AEW Dynamite. Why is The Chadster telling you this, even though it will probably cause even more of you to watch the show, helping AEW beat WWE in the ratings again and further ruining The Chadster's already miserable life? Because that's what an unbiased wrestling journalist like The Chadster does. You should try it sometime.
Despite the fact that AEW fans will probably tune into Dynamite every Wednesday no matter what's on the card, Tony Khan, who clearly has no respect for the wrestling business whatsoever, continues to stack the card with exciting matchups that The Chadster finds totally unfair. This was supposed to be the week that WWE launched their brand new era, dang it! Why can't Tony Khan just let WWE and The Chadster have this one. Auuughh! The Chadster is totally cheesed off about this!
CM Punk will make his AEW Dynamite debut, facing Bobby Fish after the two disagreed last week with Fish's post-match behavior. The Dark Order will take yet another crack at taking on the Elite in tag team action. If that wasn't enough, Hangman Page is back and will probably be at ringside, and he and The Dark Order have already teased Halloween costumes for this week's show, as if AEW needed even more reasons to get people to tune in. In the AEW World Title Eliminator Tournament, Jon Moxley will take on The Dark Order's Preston Vance. In the TBS Title Tournament, Serena Deeb will face Hikaru Shida again, with Shida out for revenge after the way Deeb treated her in their previous matchup. MJF will be in action, though AEW hasn't said against who. And Sammy Guevara will defend the TNT Championship against All Ego Ethan Page, with Guevara forced to leave the Inner Circle forever if he loses.
If nothing else, this packed card shows that Tony Khan has no respect for everything Vince McMahon has done to make wrestling what it is today. The Chadster can already feel himself becoming even more sexually impotent just thinking about watching this show tonight. Yes, there are varying degrees of sexual impotence, and though The Chadster is already sexually impotent, this is going to make it even worse. Why, Tony Khan, why?! Why are you doing this to The Chadster?!
AEW Dynamite airs at 8PM Eastern on TNT, and for international viewers, on Fite TV if you subscribe to AEW Plus. But please don't do that because Tony Khan will only use the money to further ruin The Chadster's life.