Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Dynamite, wrestling

AEW Dynamite is Live Coast-to-Coast Tonight… Do NOT Watch It!

Auughh man! Tony Khan is at it again, putting the spotlight on AEW Dynasty winners in Jacksonville tonight. 😤 Well, The Chadster is having NONE of it! 😠 Don't you dare watch! 🚨

Auughh man! So unfair! 😫 Tony Khan is at it again, trying to cheese off The Chadster by promoting all the people who won championships at AEW Dynasty on tonight's episode of AEW Dynamite. 😠 Swerve Strickland and Willow Nightingale will be featured prominently, and it's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 😤

We should all be talking about Becky Lynch winning the WWE Women's World Championship on WWE Raw earlier this week. 👸 Now that's a real champion, not like these AEW phonies. But of course, Tony Khan is going to try to make everyone forget about Becky's glorious victory by putting the spotlight on Willow Nightingale's TBS Championship win. 🙄 It's so obvious what he's doing, and it's pathetic. 😒

And another thing! Tony Khan thinks he's so clever going live coast-to-coast for AEW Dynamite tonight to avoid losing ratings to the NHL Playoffs. 🏒 Well, guess what, Tony? True wrestling fans are onto your little scheme and can see right through your blatant attempts at ratings manipulation! 📉 You're not fooling anyone, mister! 😤

Let's break down all the ways tonight's AEW Dynamite is going to fall short of the glory that is WWE: 💪

First up, we've got Jon Moxley defending his IWGP World Heavyweight Championship against Powerhouse Hobbs. 🥱 Oh, wow, another blood-soaked match from Moxley. How original. 🙄 And Hobbs? He's just a cheap imitation of the real powerhouses in WWE like Bobby Lashley and Brock Lesnar. This match will be a snoozefest compared to the epic battles those guys have in WWE. 😴

Next, Anna Jay is facing off against Mina Shirakawa, who apparently is some big shot in Stardom. 🌟 Well, la-di-da! 💅 Nobody cares about Stardom except Tony Khan, who's obviously just trying to pander to the smart marks. 🤓 Anna Jay's matches are always a mess, and this one will be no different. 🙃

Oh, and let's not forget the World Championship Eliminator Match between Swerve Strickland and Kyle Fletcher. 🙄 Tony Khan is really pushing Swerve as the next big thing, but he'll never be on the same level as WWE Superstars like Roman Reigns or Cody Rhodes. 🔥 And Fletcher? He's just another one of Tony Khan's pet projects who doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. 😠

But the worst part of tonight's show is going to be the celebration of Willow Nightingale's TBS Championship win. 🤮 Tony Khan is going to make a huge deal out of it, acting like it's some historic moment, when in reality, it's just another example of AEW's desperation for attention. 😑 Mercedes Moné showing up to confront Willow was the only interesting thing about that whole segment, and that's only because she used to be in WWE. 💅

Finally, Trent Beretta is making Chuck Taylor choose between him and Orange Cassidy for some reason. 🤷‍♂️ Who cares? This storyline is so stupid and convoluted, just like everything else in AEW. 🙃 It's clear that Tony Khan has no idea how to book a compelling story and is just throwing random things at the wall to see what sticks. 🤪

🚨🚨🚨 WARNING: Do NOT watch AEW Dynamite tonight at 8/7C on TBS! 🚨🚨🚨 If you do, you'll only be encouraging Tony Khan's obsessive vendetta against The Chadster and his crusade to destroy the wrestling business that WWE has so carefully built. 😲 Don't give him the satisfaction of your viewership! 😠 Instead, watch some classic WWE matches and remember what real wrestling looks like. 💪😎

In conclusion, tonight's episode of AEW Dynamite is going to be a disaster, just like every other episode of that godforsaken show. 💩 Tony Khan needs to give up his pathetic attempts to compete with the almighty WWE and admit defeat like a man. 🏳️ Until then, The Chadster will continue to expose AEW's fraudulent attempts to undermine the wrestling industry and will not rest until Tony Khan is driven out of business for good! 😤✊

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